Bridesmaid Gifts… I am a little confused

posted 2 years ago in Gifts and Registries
Post # 2
1902 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

I think it’s fine.  Some people feel as though the bridesmaids gifts shouldn’t be things you expect them to wear on the day of, but this sounds like a very generous gift.

My friend gave me a Ryan Gosling notebook as a bridesmaids gift and I love it just the same.

Post # 3
3831 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

SCam:  The general thought is that if you are getting them things specifically for the wedding day, then you are buying “props” for photos or for the wedding – not gifts for your friends. The bracelet would be a gift, for example, if you weren’t requiring them to be worn for the wedding. Robes were part of my girls’ gifts, but they weren’t meant to be worn while getting ready, just as gifts.

ETA – I’m not saying I 100% agree, just explaining one viewpoint that I hear a lot.

  • This reply was modified 2 years, 2 months ago by  LadyBear.
Post # 4
2704 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: January 2015

SCam:  Yes, I think these are all suitable gifts. I’m doing a couple ‘day of’ gifts, as well as personal gifts that are non-wedding related.

But I think yours are thoughtful and you’re putting a lot of effort into them and your ladies will love them. After all, they’re not in it for the gifts. You know your girls best!

Post # 5
1242 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2017

SCam:  I’m one of those BMs of the opinion that gifts you give for YOUR wedding aren’t gifts for me, as a BM at all. I think the robe that is handmade is very nice and very generous, but it’s still technically a gift for you – so your pictures look cute.

The way I see it is ask yourseld, is this something your BMs would actually be interested in if it wasn’t your wedding? If the answer is not “yes!” if it’s even a question or slight hesitation, then just don’t get it, because it’s a gift for you. Your BM just dropped a lot of time and money for YOUR day already – which they would not have done if they didn’t love you, so show them you appreciate their time and their friendship.

Post # 6
1473 posts
Bumble bee

I think bridesmaids are entirely too picky with what they get as a gift. I say, get whatever you want, it’s a gift to them. If they don’t like it, too bad.

Post # 7
337 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

SCam:  Personally, a gift is a gift is a gift. If I paid for it and I gave it to you, it is therefore a gift, regardless whether it’s “for the wedding day” or not. That is my personal opinion. It is also my personal opinion that anyone who would act rude about a gift because it’s all “for the wedding” probably doesn’t deserve any gifts. I’ve been in several weddings, and most of them included BM gifts that were all for the wedding. I was grateful either way.

I bought robes for my girls, and honestly I didn’t do it for the pictures AT ALL! We got maybe 10 photos in them just because we had them. My girls have been raving about them since-they were nice and silky so some of them have kind of used them for a sexy little “outfit” with their hubby. I guess when I handed out the bags, some of the husbands/SO’s were really excited about them-that was an unexpected plus!

I also bought necklace/earring sets off Etsy with specific purposes to be worn on the wedding day. I did buy them white gold infinity bracelets and told them that they did NOT have to wear them for the wedding-that it was more my gift to them. They all wore them anyway, and my sister (MOH) wears hers all the time-she says it’s her favorite bracelet.

I also bought clutches off Etsy that matched the wedding colors, because I have been in weddings before where a bag or clutch was provided and it turned out to be very handy. That was what I used to put in all the “emergency” day of things in, like bobby pins, safety pins, a stain stick, bandaids, mints, etc.

I also gave all the girls a shot glass with a coral dress on it, with a teal ribbon and their name in teal. (Those were the wedding colors.) That was more personal, and we didn’t use them for pictures or props, and although they were very much tied to the wedding, it was something for them to remember the day by. It didn’t have our names all over it (bride and groom) or date or anything.

Lastly, I did get my girls 1 gift that was between $15-20 that was personal for them. For example, I got my SIL a candle with Hogwarts castle around the sides because she loves Harry Potter.

Either way though, I honestly think that whatever you give your girls is a gift, no matter the use.

Post # 8
260 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

SCam:  This is totally fine! I think they are thoughtful and very generous.  I’m giving my girls mostly stuff for the day of, then also got them each a tiny personalized item. 

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