- 5 years ago
- Wedding: November 1999
I’d like some advice on how to handle a bridesmaid situation. I’ve complained about her here before… But a quick recap.. She’s been ignoring me. I’ve tried to reach out to her regarding wedding stuff and non-wedding stuff, but she never answers my calls or messages. Its been hurtful, and I’m starting to really resent her.
A few weeks ago another bridesmaid and I went to order her dress. We went for dinner after. About a week before I texted the difficult BM and asked if she wanted to come. I got what I felt, a “cold” text back about her being too busy and me not understanding how busy she is. Anyway, she said she’d call me spring break and we’d order the dress.
well, spring break has come and gone and I didn’t hear a word from her. Since she seemed so annoyed last time I contacted her, I didn’t bother calling her this week.
Now, my problem… I wanted these dresses ordered back in February, but understandably people get busy. I gave my BM the deadline of April 30th then. I balllparked a deadline, as three months seemed fair.
Well, its april now and she still hasn’t ordered. I’m so annoyed with her that I don’t care if she doesn’t order the dress. I’ve already accepted that the sides could be uneven. I’m actually terrified that if she does order the dress, she’s going to be too busy to show up to the wedding. I mean, if she’s so busy she can’t take a half hour out of her night to get fitted, how is she going to take time for a whole day of the wedding? I actually plan to nicely confront her about my feelings, but she never called me.
I asked the store the official deadline to order the dress, and they said end of may. So she actually does have an extra month.
So what do I do?
Should I contact her near the end of april, and tell her that the april 30 deadline is approaching and she needs to order the dress?
Should I tell her she actually has until end of may?
Should I let april pass and then tell her in May she has extra time?
Should I just not say anything, and when the deadline of april or may passes, tell her “too bad, so sad”?
I had told her I’d pay her deposit, so I don’t think I can just tell her to go when she has time and order it. I’ll need to be there.
I just don’t know what to do, because I’d honestly be happier if she decided to step down, but I don’t want to kick her out.