(Closed) Bridesmaid help! ( Kinda Long)

posted 7 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 3
Member
297 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

You have a couple options…

Wait and see if she can make it, if she can great! If she can’t, move your BM to MOH and you could just have her and your JBM (I know people get hung up on even numbers, but really why)

Another option is to ask someone else but only if you truly think they should be your MOH.

I strongly feel that you should not have people in your wedding party to just to fill a spot. They should be people that mean something to you and will be you through out the wedding planning and on the day. 

Asking someone to be a standby BM or MOH could be a bit of a slap in the face, like being told you are on the B list. 

Post # 5
Member
244 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

I asked my brothers. I don’t have a lot of girl friends and I didn’t want to ask some random person. I did end up with one girl for a bridesmaid, mostly because my little brother begged me not to make him hold my skirt up while I went to the bathroom and because my other brother said he wasn’t sure he was up to throwing a bridal shower…LOL 🙂 But you don’t have to worry about the numbers matching at all, so if you end up with only 2 people that you really care about, that’s perfect!

Post # 7
Member
424 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

I don’t know that you actually need to ‘bump’ anyone up if your air force friend can’t attend.  If your air force friend is your best friend, I’d leave the spot for her.  If she can’t attend then it shouldn’t really affect anything.  All the MOH really needs to do is hold your flowers and sign your license.  Your bridesmaid can still do that.

I think what I’m trying to say (but badly) is that if this is your best friend and you want to honour her, I would let her have the honour if she can be there or not.

Post # 8
Member
1137 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

Numbers don’t have to match – I’ve got 4 BMs and my FI has only 2 GMs.

With that being said, if you want her as your MOH, do it, but realize things may not come together (like bridal showers, unless someone else plans).

My MOH is my one sister, who lives 7+ housr away and just had a baby. I knew she would be busy and not be able to help, but I want her there that day for me. With the help of my Mom and other sister (who is also a BM), they planned a shower and she is planning to attend (which is 10 hours away from her, about 3 from me).

Of my three BMs, none have really helped or done much. My other sister just says which she likes better (sometimes), my BFF does help out when she can, but she’s busy, and my FSIL is always having a reason not to do things.

So – don’t worry if they can help out or not, and don’t worry about the wedding. If she can’t make it, do odd numbers, and have her there in spirit.

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