(Closed) Bridesmaid Nightmare

posted 5 years ago in Bridesmaids
  • poll: Should I have the girls be a bridesmaid?
    Yes- It will save you from war : (0 votes)
    No- Your choice is your choice and no one elses : (71 votes)
    58 %
    No- But offer (again) for them to do a reading but nothing else : (50 votes)
    41 %
    Yes- but let his family know that this is the LAST thing they can butt in about : (2 votes)
    2 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    1132 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: June 2013

    For what it’s worth, I would not have anyone in my wedding party if I did not know their name. Maybe you can find a way to include them in the wedding that does not involve them being bridesmaids. Just say that while you would love to include them, you picked your bridesmaids because they are very close to you and have a special connection with you. How about we see if Sally and Molly can help in some other way?

    Post # 4
    Member
    5007 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: September 2013

    I would hold your ground unless maybe his mother is paying for the entire wedding. Be nice to her, tell her you will involve them in other ways (come up with something fast!) but that you don’t have room in the bridal party. It’s expensive to have a lot of bridesmaids anyway!

    Post # 5
    Member
    2117 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: October 2013

    Well I can’t really vote because I don’t agree with any of the options…

     

    I would, for the sake of the relationship and my sanity, have the 2 girls be bridesmaids.

    Post # 8
    Member
    4355 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: June 2013

    Hell no. Even offering a reading is far too generous in my opinion. I would just tell her that being a bridesmaid comes with some personal memories and moments (um, hi changing and whatnot) and you want that to be people you are only VERY close to.

    She’s out of her tree to think she can dictate wedding party even IF she were paying for the wedding.

    Post # 9
    Member
    278 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: July 2013

    @Megatron:  What is it about weddings that make people going effing insane?! Stick to your guns. It may make them happy – but you know you’re going to spending your whole night regretting asking these two strangers to be in your wedding party. They’ll be in all the pictures, etc and you will never get away from it. Your Fiancee will get over it. 

    Post # 11
    Member
    119 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: September 2012

    I think having them do a reading instead of being a bridesmaid is perfect! I just have one stray thought…does your MIL want this or do your FI’s cousins want this? If your MIL has a super strong personality like you said then she may be telling the cousins they should be in the wedding and they actually share your opinion of not having someone in the bridal party you don’t know! Maybe reaching out to them to see if it was their idea or your MIL’s and when she suggests it again, let her know that you have spoken with cousin A and B and you have come up with what the 3 of you want to do, thanks anyway.

    If it was their idea, simply let them know that you would be honored for them to do a reading for you and your FI since the bridal party has already been decided on for months…

    Either way, stand your ground on your decision!!

    Post # 12
    Member
    1132 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: June 2013

    Especially given that they aren’t contributing financially to the wedding I would just say no. Or tell your fiance you have some second cousins who he needs to make groomsmen. Explain in the nicest terms possible that you choosing the girls you have is an honor to the friendship you have with them. You don’t have that connection with Susie and Mary or whatever their names are.

    Post # 14
    Member
    500 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: May 2013

    I am 100% on your side, its your bridal party! You shouldnt be bullied into having two girls you barely know stand up with you just to make things even. these are the girls your going to be spending alot of time with the day of and if I were them I wouldnt want to do it so i can sit there awkwardly as your so close and having fun with your girls and i know nothing about anything your talking about except your marrying my cousin. AWKWARD!!!! 

    Post # 16
    Member
    2781 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: October 2013

    If it means so much to him tell him to have them be groomswomen.

    The topic ‘Bridesmaid Nightmare’ is closed to new replies.

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