Post # 1
I don’t like how one of my bridesmaid keeps putting her two cents in about what I should do at the wedding. This only happened a couple of times but that’s only b/c I saw her only twice: when picking out bridesmaid dresses in Jan, and last night at my bachelorette party. I’m afraid that at the rehearsal and even worse on the wedding day she will be intimidating and pressure me/criticize me to do things a certain way. That’s her personality, and she thinks she’s helping. One thing I want to do is have my bridesmaids come in from shortest to tallest. Which is perfect b/c she is the shortest and that means she can stand the furthest away from me at the altar. I’m afraid she’s going to tell me to do it the other way around. I’m afraid then when I keep my foot down, she’ll appear mad and it will be obvious that I don’t want her near me.
I don’t want to throw her out. There’s already drama b/c I threw one out, and I know she doesn’t approve.
Help me stand up to her….
Post # 3
I guess I would say, just either ignore her comments and move along with what you are doing, or maybe say, gee Thanks for the idea, I’ll think about that, and do what you want. As far as having the shortest BM (her) away from you, I would have your photographer help with that. Let the photographer know what you want. (Then if you end up not wanting her in any photos, she will be easier to crop out! ) lol I hope this all works out for you. 🙂
Post # 4
She really might just think she is being helpful. I’m in a friends wedding and I kept suggesting things until I realized I should probably wait until she asks for help. Just tell her “Thanks for the advice, but I think I already have that covered.” Just let her know firmly that you’ve already decided on XY&Z and you don’t really need suggestions and that she should support your decisions.
Post # 5
Hm. I am related to a lot of people like this. I would just say what you want, and then forget about everybody else’s problems. These kinds of people will overpower you, so you have to just do what you want, and sort of tune out the rest.
PS- I think shortest to tallest is the most aesthetically pleasing- tell her that!
Post # 6
On the altar it will be tallest to shortest (meaning taller ones closer to me), but the procession is shortest to tallest. I think I will tell her it’s more aesthetically pleasing.
Post # 7
I would say just ignore her. When people give their advice they often think they are helping when really they are just being annoying. Nod and say “I’ll take that into consideration” and then do what you want lol. And for the record, saying that you “threw one out” doesn’t make you sound very nice…. So I hope you didn’t mean it that way! Good luck!
Post # 8
Oh my god… my FSIL is just like that… I vent about her any chance I get in here, it keeps my sanity LOL.
But yeah, you HAVE to put your foot down. It won’t look awkward if she stomps her feet over it– you won’t look bad, she will.
YOU HAVE TO STAND YOUR GROUND!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I learned this from this experience with my FSIL from hell… considering it a lifelong lesson to not allow yourself to be intimidated or -controlled-.