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If you already told her to do it at the rehearsal dinner, than I think you should allow her. The time to decline the offer was when she first brought it up.
You could speak with whoever is throwing the rehearsal dinner to ensure it is OK. If its not OK than you could tell your BM that since you are not throwing the party arent in charge of the schedule of it and "so and so" requested no additional speeches above those already scheduled. But I wouldnt make that up, dont like, only if its true.
I would meet up with her for lunch. Tell her you've been thinking about it and while you love the thought and kindness of it but would ideally like to keep the toasts to a minimum. She may be hurt by it but if its that big a deal letting her down gently is the only way to go.
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One of my bridesmaids wants to do a toast at my wedding. She didnt ask, she just kind of told me. We just want it to be the MOH and Best Man that gives a toast. She is so excited about giving it. I asked her to give it at the rehearsal dinner but Im not even comfortable with that. I dont know how to break this to her without hurting her feelings.