Post # 1
so i have 6 girls total but i have one that is young , shes my cousin and she’s a hot mess right now. my wedding is in a year 1/2 but by the spring she is going to have to think about having the money towards her dress and such for the remainder of the time before the wedding.
she does nothing but complain to me about money, she can barely pay her bills, etc… and now she gets engaged and is pushing her wedding up to have it before mine! so not only can she not pay her bills, she wants to try and have a wedding before mine!
her daughter is the flower girl. but my aunt has guaranteed me they will pay for my flower girl and theres no issue with that. but she will not give my cousin money.
so do i let it ride and when it comes time to get the dresses if she doesnt have the money give her the opportunity to walk away then and focus on her own wedding, etc…
i dont want my sister (maid of honor) or hte other girls to have to worry about forking out more money to make up for the things that she cant afford along the way…
is there a right way to go about this situation? knowing that this is going to prob be a financial burden on her and i dont want to have to plan for my bridesmaids around her….
such a tough situation…..
Post # 3
Money is always a touchy subjet. When it doubt, it is usually best not to inquire into her finances. However, since she is family and because she and her daughter are both in the wedding, it might be okay to set up some expectations. Just let her know the general timeline of typical expenses and ask her to let you know if she thinks it might be a problem. My bridesmaids are ordering their dresses right after Christmas, so I included a few sentences about the price range, deposit and let them know that they could come to me with any money issues.
Post # 4
Friendship and finances almost never mix well, throw in dueling weddings and clashing personalities and you’ve got a prime set up for a cage match!
If it were me, I would do my best to make sure I had the dress and whatever else your ladies are going to need to buy picked out and priced…THAT way, you’ve been proactive and upfront with the cost and your cousin can either decide to allocate money to that or not, regardless, you are prepared for her to cry poverty over the entire thing, which means you won’t have to get upset about it and when that time comes, happily tell her it’s fine and you would love to invite her as a guest.
Post # 5
Why would the other BMs help her? Wouldn’t that be your job?