Post # 1
My “best friend” and bridesmaid doesnt not want to buy her dress. I finally found a dress today at Davids Bridal, after looking and looking, I was having no luck. So I was so excited to finally found a dress!
Well She told me awhile back she could only spend 45 dollars on a dress. Not sure what im suppose to buy with 45 dollars? But I tried. I looked at Debs, Found a dress that we both agreed with, and was in her price range. Well they couldnt order anymore, so those were out.
The dress I found at Davids Bridal is $140. Plus a Cumberbun with it which is $20, but I thought I could buy those since the dress is already so much. I feel kinda bad because I feel like its kinda spendy, but everyone else was ok with it except for her. She freaked out on me.
She just got married last December, and I spent almost $500 on her wedding. My dress was only $40 but my fiance is her brother so we had to rent him, and his son each a tux, which were $140 a piece. Then all the little things that I needed to buy for her wedding. Originally, she had a $280 dollar dress picked out!! I didnt want to, but I told her I would buy it. Thank God she didnt. But I was still willing. I dont know what to do. If I dont buy the dress for her, then she wont be in the wedding. I want her too, But I dont know what to do!
She is a difficult person. She likes everything to be about her! She is making this whole wedding process hard, because she is going to complain about everything I pick out. Nothing will be good enough for her. Not sure what to do. 🙁
Post # 3
If she really has a $45 limit and was honest with you about that up front, I think you should either let her pick a different dress in her price range or pay the difference so she can afford it.
Post # 4
$45 seems very low for a dress. I know hers were that low, but she shouldn’t honestly think everybody else’s should be. I’m trying to wrack my brain thinking of a solution, but I can’t. What does the dress look like? Maybe you can find something similar somewhere else? Can you post a photo or link?
Maybe you could get your Fiance to talk to her since he’s her brother. If he mentioned how much you paid in her wedding would it make things worse, or would it maybe help her come to her senses?
Post # 5
This is the dress, It will be black, with the red cumberbun. (which like I said, I was going to pay for)
He has tried talking to her about it, it just makes things worse. When I mention how much we spent on her wedding, she says that we should have said that we couldnt do it. We did what we she needed us to for her wedding. But she cant do the same for ours. My Fiance said maybe I could just ask her to come up with $100 and we will pick up the rest (which we figured will be about another $100) And maybe I just wont get her a gift? I was going to get the girls Clutches, with necklaces. So she can just keep the necklace, and I wont get her the clutch since i would be paying for her shoes, hair and part of the dress? Would that be ok maybe?
Post # 6
Have you considered having the dress custom made? I know it sounds expensive but it’s actually not! Here in California there are a lot of Asian places that custom make dresses for really cheap. For example, my friend recently got married and had her bridesmaid dresses made. She picked out the one she liked (around $500), went to an Asian place, showed her the pictures, picked out the fabric, etc and had the dress made for about $150. Since the dress was made to your measurements you save on alterations too.
I know $150 is still over your budget but considering thats $150 in California (which is known for overcharging for wedding stuff) and it was a $500 dress so I might be cheaper in Oregon?
I hope this helps!
Post # 7
I was going to suggest the same thing about having it made 🙂
Post # 8
@Colieee34: That was the same dress I saw that I liked and wanted my BMs to wear but I didnt think they all would go for that price either.
Post # 9
Post # 10
You don’t say exactly why she can’t afford that: are she and her husband working? Do they have kids/an expensive mortgage/car payments, etc., that make it impossible to spend more than this, or is she just being ridiculous?
The way I see it, you have a few options:
1. Pay for the extra amount for her dress.
2. Don’t have her in the wedding.
3. Find a cheaper dress for her.
Post # 11
You need to decide what is more important to you- having her in the wedding (and as a friend) or a dress.
Personally if my best friend couldn’t afford the dress I wanted then I would just pay for it because it would be more important for me to have her there than who paid for the dress. And if I couldn’t afford it I would just find a dress that worked within the budget.
Weddings are a one day party- relationships hopefully last a life time.
Post # 12
David’s offers a credit card and 6 month interest free. They also offer layaway for 60 days with 25% down. Maybe that’s an option.
Post # 13
I agree with ms Fahrenheit …but where I’m getting married BMs are not expected to buy their dresses themselves so maybe I’m biased
Post # 14
- Wedding: June 2012 - Pippin Hill Farm & Vineyards
How about a J. Crew bridesmaid dress for $48? An Ann Taylor bridesmaid dress for $41?
Just because the budget is tight doesn’t mean she can’t have a well made dress. Forget Davids Bridal. You have find a far better gown if you look online.
Read this thread but ignore the cheap dresses in the first post…scroll down): http://boards.weddingbee.com/topic/cheap-options-for-bridesmaids-dresses
Post # 15
In my opinion, if you choose a specific dress, especially for such a high price, you can’t expect your BMs to be on board with it. And she did tell you her budget from the start, and yet you fidn something for over 3 times her budget. Throwing in her face how much you spent on her wedding is unfair too, and I really do agree with her – if you couldn’t afford it, then why didn’t you say so to her then?
For a solution, I’d say what has already been said. Either you pay the difference from her given budget, find another dress for her, or you don’t have her as a Bridesmaid or Best Man…
Post # 16
i have to agree with PPs, she told you her budget ahead of time, doesn’t matter how much you spent on her wedding, she can’t afford that dress. if you want her to get that dress, you should pay the difference, simple as that