Bridesmaids Ettiquette – Do I get them a gift?

posted 2 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 3
Member
1154 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: January 2015

I’d get them something small.  I’m paying for my girls’ everything (hotels, hair/makeup, dresses, etc.) and not having a shower or bachelorette and getting them (I believe) matching purses (nothing too expensive) with different things in them, like mini champagne bottles and what not, and compact mirrors with their initials engraved on them.  

Post # 4
Member
42538 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

I still think it would be nice for you to get them a gift expressing your appreciation for their standing up with you. The fact that you are paying for hair and makeup is irrelevant. That’s your choice. I assume that they are still paying for their dress, shoes etc.

If the budget is tight get them one thoughtful item each, instead of a bag of junky lttle items that they will never use. Shop for each girl as if it were her birthday.

Post # 5
Member
175 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: July 2014

I would absolutely give them a gift to show your appreciation for them taking the time to be a part of your wedding.  I think it would be weird not to thank them in anyway on this very important part of your life.

Post # 6
Member
7654 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2012

FabBride2016:  I think you have gotten them quite a bit already, but a card and a small box of chocolates wouldn’t hurt. It would be a nice gesture.

Post # 7
Member
1801 posts
Buzzing bee

Thats not tacky at all! The wedding I was in I didnt even get a verbal thank you, or text. Let alone a present. You are very generous to pay for the hair and stuff too, I remem er how expensive that is. 

Post # 8
Member
3201 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2015

FabBride2016:  I tend to think of their hair and make-up as a gift, so I would count those. Get them a card with a heartfelt note in each and then a small token and call it a day. 

Post # 9
Member
2704 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: January 2015

FabBride2016:  

I would do something small just to avoid any drama or tell them hair/make-up is their gift. I would be very happy with a card and hair/make-up! That’s very generous.

I was in my friends wedding and she bought our dresses for us as our thank you gift. Not a ‘present’ really, but it took a cost off of us so it was appreciated. (we were also responsible for the alterations, the bride just paid for the dresses).

Post # 10
Member
1157 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

FabBride2016:  Paying for their hair and makeup IS a gift.  My bridesmaids were shocked when I said I was paying for their hair, they’re not expecting anything more. 

Post # 11
Member
2166 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

I’d get them a small something, or maybe even just a handmade card detailing how happy you are they’re with you, why you love them, etc.  It doesn’t have to be expensive or big, just thoughtful.

Post # 12
Member
11740 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

I would get them a gift.  All the bridesmaids are supposed to do are buy the dresses and show up clean and sober at the wedding.  Everything else is above and beyond.  You’ve been very generous with them, but no one forced you to take them out for a $500 meal.

I also do not consider hair and makeup to be part of the gift.  They’re getting it done for your wedding, not for themselves.  It’s for your benefit, not theirs, so it’s not really a gift.

Post # 13
Member
8426 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: April 2013

FabBride2016:  Honestly, I think it depends on your social circle/culture.  If it’s common for your friends to purchase their own dresses, hair/make-up, shoes, jewelry, etc., then a nice card and/or a small gift will probably suffice.  In my culture, the bride is expected to pay for accommodations, hair/make-up, dresses, jewelry, shoes, transportation, and any other wedding related expenses (I didn’t do a bachelorette or shower, planned/made everything myself), so I ended up spending about $100 on each bridesmaid gift.

Post # 14
Member
5199 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: April 2013

 

FabBride2016:  I think it’s fine.  You are paying for their hair & make up and have already got them a gift at the bachelorette. 

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