(Closed) Bridesmaids! To be a B****, or not to be! UGH.

posted 5 years ago in Bridesmaids
  • poll: What to do?
    Invite J and K. Have S and sister as wedding party. : (25 votes)
    60 %
    Invite K, forget about J. Have S and sister as wedding party. : (7 votes)
    17 %
    Invite J. Have K, S, and sister as wedding party. : (0 votes)
    Include everyone as bridesmaids. : (3 votes)
    7 %
    No wedding party. : (7 votes)
    17 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    8042 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper
    • Wedding: December 2013

    @Liinuska:  Sure, go without bridesmaids, or make S your maid of honor, and your sister your maitron of honor (or vice versa).

    Or just invite a select few people… so cut out J and K altogether and tell them you’re keeping it family only (with the exception of S who is your BFF).

    Sounds like you don’t want the drama and don’t really want bridesmaids at all. I’d nip this in the bud!

    Post # 4
    Member
    2295 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: April 2013

    Do S and Sister. Only have people who you really want.

    Post # 6
    Member
    933 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: August 2013

    This was a really obvious one for me because I have no emotional connection to the people involved. It is really clear to me that you should have your sister & best, oldest friend as your bms.  And that someone you’ve known for less than a year that you mostly know professionally has no business inviting herself to be a bm. So you don’t need to feel bad.  As for inviting the friends, why wouldn’t you invite them?  I have friends I find annoying but I would still invite them for social reasons. Plus we are still friends even if I don’t like them every moment of the day.

    Post # 7
    Member
    108 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: October 2013

    I think it is important for you to remember that ultimately on your wedding day you should be surrounded by people that you love and who love you.  I had a situation happen to me in which my best friend assumed that she was in my wedding, but FI and I had decided that we wanted to keep the wedding party small(having our siblings only in the wedding). Well when I told her that she wasn’t walking in the wedding she absolutely freaked out…to the point that I asked her  to be in it anyway. She is a really great friend and I don’t have many so it was important for me to try and include her once I saw how it important it was to her. I’m not the type of person that would be affected if I couldn’t be in someone’s wedding, but a lot of people take it to heart. If you decide not to include them, just be careful of how you tell them…especially since you said that you are a pretty blunt person.

    Post # 10
    Member
    10367 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: September 2010

    You don’t have to have a bridal party – I didn’t! And nobody cared! Keeps the drama to a minimum and lets you focus on what you want to enjoy on your big day.

    Post # 12
    Member
    4574 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: April 2012

    Have people who you really want there, remember they will be in all your bridal pics and if you don’t really want them there and only did it to be nice, you will be stuck looking at photos with people in it that might not always be in your life.  Its your day and your future hubby’s after all, who cares if people get mad, they will get over it.  You shouldn’t have to please everyone.

    Post # 14
    Member
    933 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: August 2013

    @Liinuska:  Yes, I can see how that would get awkward with your friend being too clingy at the reception.  You can certianly choose your bms now & then make the decision whether to invite her at a later date. 

    I love dogs! What a coincidence.

    Post # 15
    Member
    1796 posts
    Buzzing bee

    @canarydiamond:  +1

    If they are clingy like that, they may make you go bridezilla looking if if you guys dont agree, or alot of drama. Keep the bestie and your sister–you know what to expect from them.

    Post # 16
    Member
    2053 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: October 2011

    @Liinuska:  Awesome decision. S and sister in bridal party. As for J and K, their reaction to being invited to your wedding is up to them. If they choose the immature route of b*tching about not being in your bridal party, that is their problem and they can choose not to come, but the decision is laid before them and for them to make at that point. Hopefully, instead, they will be happy for you on your day and honored to be present in any capacity.

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