(Closed) Bridezilla – Embrace it!

posted 6 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
Member
4465 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: February 2012

Hear hear!

Post # 4
Member
471 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

I hear you sister!!! Standing ovation

Post # 5
Hostess
11174 posts
Sugar Beekeeper

I have said it before and I will say it again, I hate the word Bridezilla. I swear it was created by wedding vendors in order to manipulate brides into a lesser agressive form.

I have caught myself backing down to vendors (case in point a very bad makeup artist) rather than standing up for what I wanted because I didn’t want to be deemed a Bridezilla. I even said the words “I’m not a bridezilla but…”. I should in no way have to apologize for wanting things a certain way especially when I am paying you to provide those things as I see fit.

 

Post # 6
Member
8319 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

Whilst I agree that I hate the word bridezilla and that it is over used I don’t agree with some of your statements. If you want everything your own way then I think you need to make sure you don’t accept any help for anyone (financial or otherwise) and if you want to drop things commonly accepted by your society as minimum requirements for hosting a party then I really think you should just elope and not invite nayone to your wedding.

Just my opinion. 

Post # 8
Member
8319 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

@Cat.herine:  I didn’t say that brides couldn’t have an individualised wedding but that there are basic requirements that shouldbe meet such as feeding and watering your guests, providing releif from the elements (as in not making guests stand in the full burning sun for your hour long ceremony). That was the minimum requirements I was talking about. If you aren’t prepared to take the comfort of your guests into account then yes I really do think you should have no guests at your wedding.

As to your first comment if FMIL is paying then I feel that she has some say in what goes on. Should she be rude about- of course not but then when accepting money for a wedding I would assume that the coupke talk to the person providing the money about any requirements they have. That way you can decline the ofer if the terms are not acceptale.

Post # 10
Member
3569 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

I hate the term bridezilla. I think there is balqnce, while the wedding is ultimately about the bride and groom, it does invovle other people and is very important to them as well. I think family is important and at least to listening and being open to others ideas.  There is a a lot tradition,ideas, that we are leaving out even if they are what our family wants, doesn’t mean we are going to go bride and groom zilla on anyone. Does that mean you should lay down and let everyone walk all over it no. I do think the bridezilla thing is part myth with a little truth mixed in. Planning a wedding can get stressful, some vendors also seem to like implying that, and are zillas themselves. I don’t think anyone should embrace any form of being a zilla.

Post # 11
Member
454 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

I don’t agree personally because for us, the wedding was NOT just about us.  But if that’s how you feel, go for it!

Post # 12
Member
1488 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

AMEN SISTER!!!

I DESPISE the term “bridezilla.” I think it’s awful that a bride is deemed a Bridezilla just because she knows what she wants for her wedding day.

I wish people would stop using this word.

Post # 13
Member
4194 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: July 2012 - Baltimore Museum of Industry

I didn’t read this to mean that the OP wasn’t going to consider the well-being of her guests. I read it as- FI and I will be in control of our day.

Ex: “You have to have music during the ceremony”- “No, we don’t HAVE to.”
(the only thing that HAS to happen it that we both show up!) 

No one’s second -guessing our choices, because we’re so firm/decided in them. I know that there are a lot of things our families wish we would do differently (get married in a church, a different dress, invite 50 random family members), but we have been strong in what our day will be, and our guests will be treated like gold. 🙂

Post # 14
Member
3569 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

I think a bridezilla is more then someone who knows what they want for their wedding day. It’s a person who has little to no reagard for other peoples feelings, it’s someone who gets power hungry and thinks because it’s a speical day they can get away with behaving badly. I do think the word is thrown around way to often for people who are overwhelmed or make  mistakes. However it’s not a term or idealogy I want to embrace.

Post # 15
Member
2866 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

No I’m not and frankly I can’t imagine why anyone would be proud to act in the ways you have listed. I sometimes wonder how many friends some brides will have left after their wedding….

Post # 16
Member
3618 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

YES!!! I literally had a mental break down because I didn’t want to stand up for what I wanted with a friendor, because I didn’t want to be labeled as a bridezilla. I literally cried for 24 hours straight. DH just kept looking at me like I was crazy and telling me that if I wanted lavender invites and not a light pinky purple invite to just tell him (our friendor).

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