Post # 1
Fiance and I did our X-mas shopping this weekend and after buying for all our family, I am broke. Like, barely able to pay bills broke. The thing is, I was extremily frugal this year. I cut back on everything and only shopped at stores that I had coupons for. Fiance and I both have huge families, so even being smart shoppers broke the bank for me.
I was supposed to go shopping for Fiance this week after work, but after looking at my bank account I realized that I can’t really afford anything for him. I feel so awful about it. I told him how upset I was and cried to him that I can’t really afford to get anything for him this year and he told me not to cry, that he doesn’t value material things and is just happy to spend Christmas with me. I know that I should be happy about this, but all I can think about is going to all the holiday parties where people excitedly ask “So, what did you get for Christmas??” And my fiance will have nothing to say. I feel like such a bad person even though I know X-Mas is not about gifts.
Anyone else in this situation?
Post # 3
We are absolutely in the same boat. Fiance is unemployed and we are getting married 3 days after Christmas!
What about going to the Dollarstore to get his stocking stuffers? Then, give him some “coupons” for things after Christmas. A nice dinner, a massage… stuff like that! You could also wait until your first pay after Christmas and pick something up during the sales!
Post # 4
Not in your situation entirely, but definately been feeling the squeeze this year! It’s always very tempting to spend loads on others, but the fact is you really don’t have to. I think I spent less than $30 on my parents presents, and less than $60 on my SOs presents. Admittedly I don’t have a huge family to buy for (I literally buy for about 4 people, cards will do for the rest)
My SO has already said he’s got me 5 things this year, which is worrying as I have only got him 2 – but who cares, they will appreciate the time and effort you put into it, rather than how easily you opened your purse. 🙂
Christmas is not worth starting the new year miserable, I’m sure you will treat your SO in other ways over the next few months upcoming 🙂
Post # 5
We are sort of in the same boat. We arent broke but we rather use the money towards our downpayment.
I guess since we both understand the situation I dont feel even remotely bad. In the end, I am just happy to be able to spend xmas with my dh and gifts dont matter.
Post # 6
I am in the same situation, but I don’t feel bad about it. I’m likely not getting my husband anything, he’s not getting me anything. We both agreed our daughter has had a rough year, and our Christmas funds will go to her. My parents have refused gifts, so we’ll be having our daughter hand make them something (that’s all they really want anyway). My brothers are broke students, we’ve never exchanged gifts.
It would be nice if I could get everyone a present, but I can’t, so I don’t. I bring a nice dessert to family dinner, relax and enjoy the company.
If people are asking your Fiance what you got him, why make it awkward? Give them an answer and avoid drama. “Oh she got me a really cool espresso machine I’ve been wanting.” Everyone smiles and moves on with their day.
In my family Christmas is more for the kids, but after you graduate high school you’re not getting a present from everyone!
Post # 7
I don’t think it’s dramatic to tell people that you didn’t exchange gifts. We can afford gifts for each other, but we usually don’t get each other anything for a variety of reasons – we don’t want clutter in our apartment, we’re saving to buy a house, we’d rather spend our money at a nice dinner or donating to charity, etc. I think people would understand, and frankly, it’s not their business anyway! Don’t worry about what other people think, just do what you’re comfortable with.
Post # 8
I have a huge family and it’s getting to the point where folks are going to start getting cut out. Anyhow, until I moved to America, I never got a Christmas gift in my life. I’m starting to long for those days.
Post # 9
@bRooklynRocks: DH has a huge family too, we decided to secret santa instead of gifting every single person.
Post # 10
One thing you might consider that Fiance and I have done every year since we spent most of our relationship as broke college students: give each other ornaments. They can even be handmade, which will cost a fraction of what a regular gift would be. You can even get into the habit like we do of getting one another an ornament every year, which will build a special collection of personal ornaments for your tree 🙂
Post # 11
We haven’t really done huge Christmas things in a while, especially not this year since we are moving. We are getting to the point where it isn’t really a big thing the day after Christmas to come to work and talk about what you got for Christmas. We are all grown up now and don’t really get gifts, except the occasional money from our parents or grandparents.
Post # 12
I can’t afford gifts for anyone at all this year, although my family is too big to expect that so it would only be for my parents anyway. They understand. Fiance and I agreed to save our money. It’s no one else’s business how you spend your money and you Fiance seems to be okay with it, so just enjoy spending time with him on Christmas 🙂