- 4 years ago
- Wedding: July 2014
This post really isnt about me, its about my brother and his….well his used to be fiance…
My brother and his gf have been together for almost three years, in January, I beleive will be their 3 year mark. They are fairly young (18 & 19), they had a baby last year in December (handsomest little man ever), they have an ok relationship I guess you would say, they bicker and argue like every couple does but when they actually get really mad at each other….I guess in my eyes argueing isnt that bad but fighting to me….well theres a difference between argueing and fighting and what i consider fighting is when a couple is on the verge of breaking up…..sorry that im babbling. But they fight a lot and it always leads to one of them packing their things and leaving and then they will come back the next day or even that night. (you think they would get tired of packing and unpacking their things lol)
My brother has had a bad past, smoking weed…thats his main problem. He’ll stop and start again and where we live, weed is illegal so if a person fails a drug test they cant get a job or they get fired.
Right now my brother is out of state for a temporary job, when he comes home he will have to get a different job and in order to do that he will have to pass a drug test.
They got engaged this past weekend….it hasnt even been a week.
I really dont know whats going on between the two of them right now because I havent talked to either of them. I woke up to a text from her saying that she cant do it anymore and she is done with my brother. She then text me again serveral hours later saying that she took off her ring because she feels like she should be 100% sure that they should get married and she feels like she isnt and she thinks that she shouldnt act like it will be anytime soon.
I also get an email because my facebook is connected to my email so when someone tags me in a status i get the email of what was said (even if it was deleted on facebook) so she tags me in one of her statuses but I think she deleted it because I cant find it on her profile but in the status she said that she and my brother are no longer together. He cannot stop smoking long enough for him to come home and take a drug test so he can get a job. That she is moving out and if anyone knows of an appartment she can afford then let her know.
So im pretty sure the whole fight is about him smoking weed and when they fight she confides in me and they fight so much that Im running out of things to say, I try to be positive and I try my hardest not to take her side or my brothers side. I try to stay neutral. I love them both. I want to see them in a happy, healthy relationship for themselves and my nephew.
My brothers gf tells me all the time that my brother looks up to me but ive tried to talk to him about him smoking weed and he wont listen to me or anybody, he just gets mad.
I really wish he would stop because its going to come back on him and he wont be able to provide for his family and he doesnt seem to understand that.
I love my brother dearly and I dont want to see him go down hill when I know that he can be a better person for hiself and his family. Like I said, Ive tried to talk to him and he just gets mad.
His gf tried to tell him that they have a child together, can he at least quit for his childs sake but he wont even quit for him.
I dont know what to do anymore, I know shes going to call me sometime today and I dont know what to say to her this time…..
I dont know if I should tell her to leave him and dont go back so maybe he’ll learn that his family is more important than smoking weed but I know she wont do that. They are both so jealous that even if they are broken up for good, neither of them want to see each other with a different person.
She always threatens him by telling him if he gets with someone else then their child will never see him because she doesnt want the child around another woman.
I want the best for both of them and she confides in me to give her that answer but I dont know what to say…
Sorry this was so long. I really dont know what to do. I dont know if Im looking for advise or just needed to get it out.