Post # 1
So as the wedding approaches we are getting ready to get an apartment next month. Fiance was taking for ever on making up his mind on the perfect place for us. Well in the meantime my brother and his wife singed a lease at the same apartment complex. I am kind of sad because it is a really small apartment complex and it was perfect because it is so peaceful and quite and my brother and SIL are kind of…. loud and like to have crazy parties with all of her relatives. I love my SIL to death, she is like the sister I never had BUT she does not have a good approach at borrowing other people stuff.
They currently live at our house with my folks. When they first moved in it was supposed to be temporary but due to the bad job market he was not able to get a good job. My parents let him and SIL who was pregnant at the time to live with us and it was awesome! After she had my niece (btw I love my niece and glad she is going to be close by) she did not have much clothing she could use so I told her she could use my stuff as long as she put it back or in my laundry basket and she did.
But as of the last year she has just taken my clothing and never brought it back. I am so upset because I like to know were my things are at. Then she stared to take my blow dryer, flat iron, makeup……. She would just leave everything in her room. I told her on several occasions to put my thing back and not to leave them on her bedroom floor. She still would not listen she would just say “Oh I forgot”.
The last straw that broke the camels back happened last week. I had just got back from Mexico and I brought back a bottle of tequila. As soon as I walk in she sees the bottle and says we are going to party. I say “No this is for Fiance, he wants to have a bar in our apartment”. Two days later I find out they drank half of the bottle so take the bottle and put it in my room. Next day the bottle is in the kitchen…WTF that is it! I just started to lock my room. It is ridiculous I have to lock my room in my own house. Sorry for the rant there I just had to get it out of my chest.
Any ways I am worried that she will try to do the same thing because we live close by.
My mom is so happy she is moving away because she cooks every night but does not clean the dishes. My mom ends up cleaning them which make me and my dad mad. So now they are moving, they do not have any furniture other than their bed. My mom thinks she might take some of her stuff as well like pots and pans….Oh and all of our forks disappeared last week. They literally are going to live pay check to paycheck and I am I really don’t know how they are going to buy food.
On and on top if that why in the world would they move in to the same apartments that we were going to move to? I do not even want to live there anymore. Oh and she was saying that her brothers are going to always be there and all the neighbors are going to hate them because they are going to be parting all night long. I feel like this is turning into some bad nightmare.
Ah this sucks.
Post # 3
Well, at least they’re not moving into the same apartment as you. And don’t give her a key to your place, b/c then she’ll start helping herself to your things while you aren’t there. So at least you’ll be able to start to control that aspect of things.
And if they do truly party all night, maybe the neighbors will get sick of them and call the cops on them for a noise disturbance! There’s only so much you can do, and you can’t do anything about this situation. So just try to make the best of it!!
Post # 4
Duuude I feel your pain. My SIL & her husband broke their year long lease (paid $3000 to do so btw) so they could move ACROSS THE HALL FROM US.
Mind you they’ve lived together for 3 years, they couldnt give SO(at the time, now DH) a day to ourselves. They scheduled their move-in day, since the complex wasnt finished being built yet, as the same day as ours. She picked the same building..same floor, literally across the hall.
So trust me it could be worse lol at least you *might have a building between you.
I loved my SIL until she moved in across the hall, she wore our her welcome quickly. She comes over AT LEAST once a night, the most was 8 times in one day. Since her mom is raising her toddler, I get to have my Mother-In-Law & neice over EVERY %#$^ing day too.
You would not believe how many problems this has caused between Darling Husband and I. Naturally he doesnt mind seeing them daily, but I do. I buy groceries for myself, not for her to borrow everyday.
Find somewhere else to live, save yourself the headache now. Im not even joking.
Post # 5
The good thing is that we have not singed the lease yet. I am going to look at different places this week. I really do not want to be involoved in the mess they are about to create.
Post # 6
RVG1010 don’t sign that lease look somewhere else…..you will live to regret it….if you still want to have a relationship with your brother and niece live far away……
Post # 7
Thats sucks royally… My Mother-In-Law lived down the street from us, that was bad enough with all her “drop in’s”. I would lose my mind if my in-laws lived in the same building as us.
Post # 8
Omg, I would be so miserable if my sister and her SO, or anyone in my family lived in the same apartment complex as me! Mine is small as well, only eight units. I love my family, and I love living close to them, but I need my own space away from them! It’s nice to have a place that is my own, and is away from family (and even friends). Look for a new apartment! If I were in your situation I would end up resenting them (or being embarassed, doesn’t sound like they’re planning on being very considerate of their other neighbors!). Sounds like you are craving separation from them already anyways. I wish you luck, whatever you choose! Congratulations on finding a place to lvie with your Fiance, wherever it may be.
Post # 9
I agree with PPs and if possible I would look for a new place to live. I had a coworker move in next door to me while I was in college…literally across the hall. She had parties all the time and people were always banging on my door trying to get me to come over especially when I had huge projects. She got evicted and begged me to let her stay with me. I barely knew her. When I refused, she told everyone at work what a horrible person I was to not let her crash at my place…wth?
Post # 10
A plus side is that you wont be under the same roof so a whole new set of rules applies there. She won’t have east access to your things if you don’t let her *don’t give them a key* This is a fresh start to setting better boundries when it comes to barrowing.
Post # 11
If you can’t find a new place in time, make sure you set up the boundaries early. Make it clear that dropping by is not acceptable. “Oh I’m sorry, we can’t have you on right now. We are busy. Why don’t you give us a call next week and we can plan a get-together.
Also, don’t feel bad if you have to file a noise complaint with the community center/local police. They can do it anonymously. Everyone deserves peace and quiet in their living area, especially on weeknights.