(Closed) Brother Is Pulling Out Of My Wedding

posted 7 years ago in Family
  • poll: Is it rude/wrong for him to pull out my wedding at this point?
    It's the National Guard and it's his drill weekend. He is required to go. Sorry. : (12 votes)
    50 %
    Totally uncalled for. : (1 votes)
    4 %
    He is required to go, but he could have scheduled this in advance better if he knew when drill was! : (11 votes)
    46 %
    Other : (0 votes)
  • Post # 3
    Member
    238 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: August 2011

    I think he should of let you know a long time ago about his drill. We have a best man that is a Marine and he let us know last summer that he had training in July, therefore we knew to plan our wedding in August.

     

    Post # 4
    Member
    204 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: August 2011

    @Ahone: unfortunately, he’s required to go. it’s very unfortunate that he couldn’t have planned it better, but it’s his job. i’m sorry that this is happening to you, and hopefully he’ll be able to make some changes somewhere and it has a happy ending. 😀

    Post # 6
    Member
    491 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: September 2011

    It’s the National Guard. It’s not a regular job he could call out of. If he knew in advance as most people do, the right thing would have been to let you know. But maybe he thought he could get out of it or switch it — but found out he couldn’t. At least he’s telling you now, 2 months before the wedding, compared to 2 days before.

    It could always be worse.

    Post # 8
    Member
    491 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: September 2011

    @Ahone: Right and I definitely understand your frustration. But how long have you known he’s not good at planning things in advance? How long as he been in the National Guard? Isn’t Guard 1 weekend a month, 2 weeks a year?

    I mean it really sucks your BROTHER is going to miss your wedding. Mine’s going to miss mine also, but that’s because he’s deceased — so I totally understand the aspect of him not being present, especially if you’re close. I agree he could have given you all advance notice, but again maybe he thought when he RSVP’d that he could get out of it.

    ETA: That came out really bitchy, I’m sorry. I’m just hungry. My tummy controls my mind and typing skills.
    It really sucks and I feel for you — but I highly doubt there is anyway he can get out of it.

    Post # 10
    Member
    2390 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: December 2009

    @Ahone:  My husband is in the National Guard and you are allowed 1 muta per year to have an absence.  A muta is basically 1/2 a day.  Getting out of anything related to a military training schedule is pretty unrealistic.  DH had to miss 2 sibling’s weddings and 1 siblings graduation due to training schedules. 🙁

    Yes, he should have known way in advance his drill schedule.  My husband has his schedule for the next year already.  However, his leadership may run things differently.  Also, drill dates do change.  I’m wondering if your brother thought there was a small chance he could go, but then found out from his leadership that was not the case. 

    Post # 11
    Member
    979 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: July 2011

    He can probably make it up.  I’ve been in the reserves and they work around if there is something important.  I’m quite sure since you are immiedaite family they could make an exception.  He needs to talk to his superiors and get it worked out.  But they might be jerks and not let him change his dates too, then there is nothing you can do about it.

    The topic ‘Brother Is Pulling Out Of My Wedding’ is closed to new replies.

    Find Amazing Vendors