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Rock climb! You forget that you're even working out. But if that's not your style, focus on pull ups, pushups, and lifts. Check out Jillian Michael's Making the Cut!
if you're interested at all, i really like yoga for the arms and upper body. good for you for already losing some pounds!
I wanted to tone to. Have you tried P90X- It's intense but I did it for the first time last saturday with my fiancee it's good stuff! I was sore for a few days but I feel more toned already...its probably all in my mind-HA!
I really like the Biggest Loser: Power Sculpting and Jillian Michaels: No More Trouble Zones. Those will kick you butt and help tone. Good Luck!
I am going to try a Body Pump class this weekend...it's supposed to be great for getting toned but not manly
http://www.lesmills.com/global/en/members/bodypump/bodypump-group-fitness-program.aspx
I will let you know how it goes! I am excited to see what it's going to do for me :)
I am doing the 30 Day Shred right now and love it. I also ride horses and do some barn work, which tones muscles you never knew you had. :) Pilates is also a great one for retaining and building flexibility while strengthening and building muscle.
Weight lifting (low weight, high reps) is a good way to tone. Focus on the upper body machines (haha duh). Women are always scared of getting "guy buff", but really, it's practically impossible without steroids, so I wouldn't stress. I've had years where I was lifting 5x/week (really high weight), and I didn't look like a man! I looked like a very strong woman. Good luck!!
Pilates has really worked for me. I've been taking classes for a few years now and my arms and back have never looked better! Although the emphasis is on your core (abs and back) classes often include arm exercises (like push-ups).
Weight lifting! VERY few women get bulging type muscles without taking steroids. There's lots of exercises to target your arms and back. You want to start with a level of weights where you're tired after 8-12 reps but not so tired your form is terrible. Do three sets. Repeat every 2-3 days. Increases reps until 12 is easy, then increase weight amount in the next session. There's resources online or trainers who can help with specific exercises but seriously do not be afraid of the weight lifting!
I second the yoga suggestion, and would like to add swimming to the mix. It's a great total body workout, and does a great job toning the arms.
I triple weight lifting! It doesn't necessarily help me lose weight (although it does get me to the gym, at least close to the cardio stuff), but it DEFINITELY helps me tone up. It's the only form of exercise that I really enjoy (other than games), and I enjoy it because I see (and feel) definite results very soon after starting a regimen.
I'm doing the 30 Day Shred on my off days, and while I feel like I get a good workout, I don't think it really helps build and tone muscles nearly as well as weight training.
I second Miss Biner's suggestion. Rock climb!! It's SO much better than ellipticals. It's much more interesting. I was NOT athletic and after rock climbing at least 3x a week, I noticed a difference in weeks. I felt stronger. I gained weigh b/c of muscle mass, but I trimmed down a LOT.
I also think yoga is great. If you did them together, yoga could help you strech out from climbing. I don't really think yoga works very fast. It's much more of a process. When I first started my practice (power yoga), I did it for flexibility and the mental focus. I noticed a change in my body, but it honestly wasn't a huge improvement. I wasn't trying to lose weight, though. Bikram yoga is probably the best type of yoga for getting results. You HAVE to drink more water (which helps with losing weight-you feel full and eat less) and you feel better when you eat right when you do Bikram yoga. That's a personal opinion, though.
I agree with the low weights, high reps suggestions -- perfect for the arms and upper body.
Good luck with it! I'm on a similar length journey to tone myself up -- combo of running and weights works for me.
i do kick boxing but not like tae bo... i go to an actual boxing gym called Club KO. they have a bunch up in north jersey.. if i dont go for a few weeks it only takes 2 visits to have noticeable definition in my arms and legs.. they claim you burn 700-1,000 calories in the 1 hour session... i went on and off all last year but my FI joined in December and we go about 3 times a week! i havent lost weight but i am soo much more toned... just started dieting this week so hoping i can lose a little! a HIGHLY recommend kickboxing.. great work out (its hard to finish your first few sessions), goes quick, great stress reliever, and you leave feeling fairly certain you kick @$$!
on another note- i have done pilates and love that too.. def tones and makes you more flexible.
@bluebutterfly: Body Pump is awesome! Just make sure to start with the lowest weight - My friend had too much weight on the barbell at her first class and ended up fracturing her humerus (upper arm) bone. So stay on the light side for the first few classes!
i suggest trying push-ups. they're quick and literally work every muscle in your arm and back, plus your abs too!
Ever since I saw this topic I have been searching for this website of a fellow bride who got married on Halloween like I did. I finally found it.
Just want to make sure you don't go overboard with trying to get your arms toned 
:
@Halloween - HOLY CRAP! I'm not trying to be mean, but are we sure that this person was always a 'woman'?
well do you attend a gym that has workout classes? I lost a bunch of weight and was working on toning up my body and i did 2-3 workout classes a week that included weightlifing. I've never toned up my body so fast!!! i'm very amazed at how fast my body toned up just by doing classes 3 days a week. Or you could do the weight machines at your gym a couple times a week.
Just don't forget to do cardio too b/c you can sculpt some nice toned muscles, but if you don't burn off the "fat" (for lack of a better term, not saying you're fat!) that lies on top, you won't see your results.
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I am getting married in Sept and have already embarked on a weightloss journey. I need to lost about 15-20 lbs. I am already down 6 lbs since the start of the new year. (woo-hoo!)
My problem/question is this: I don't just want to lose the weight, I want to be toned, and I daresay, buff (but not bulky like a man). I have lost weight before and looked "skinny fat"- if anyone knows what I mean by that. My dress is strapless and I don't want to have jiggly arms, etc.
Any suggestions on how I can get buff- especially in the arm/back area?
Thanks!