- 6 years ago
- Wedding: May 2013
I don’t even know where to start, other than to warn you it’s going to be a bit long.
When we first got engaged, everything was great- I was so excited and so happy. Since then there has been SO MUCH drama and so many issues with my FMIL and my FI’s family and even a bit with my own that I just feel… tired.
I’m not excited anymore, I’m frustrated.
I’m not happy, I’m constantly upset.
I’m not counting down the days in anticipation, I’m counting down until it is over.
I have just under 9 months left, and I don’t feel like myself. I’m so sad all the time, I don’t feel like this is my wedding.. my FMIL manipulates my FI and has been putting him in a horrible situation of making him choose what she wants vs what I want, and I try to save him from the situation by just giving up what I want so he doesn’t have to deal with it.
Don’t get me wrong- he has been standing up to her and basically telling her to butt out, but she doesn’t listen, she guilt trips, she yells, she’s just horrible.
I hate EVERYTHING to do with this now, to the point where I can’t bring myself to finish the save the date labels, because it reminds me just how many non-family people his parents are inviting, and the fact that they went over the guest # on their side, and so-on…
I’m not excited for the engagement party- FMIL planned that and again, went against basically everything we wanted/didn’t want (we specifically didn’t want one, we gave in because she begged, then now its this huge deal at a banquet hall…when we just wanted simple, casual, whatever.. now its at the point where we have almost 80 ppl… and its like a second reception)
FI and I have been arguing because he sees how unhappy I am, and I think that he thinks I’m blaming him (which I’m not) but its like… I don’t even know at this point WHAT could turn this around and make me excited/happy about it again?
I just want to get it over with. I don’t want to cry anymore, I don’t want to feel disappointed anymore…
Is it worth it? I’m honestly thinking that even though FI isn’t doing anything wrong and it isn’t his fault… that I may not be able to hang in there, even t hough I love him SO SO SO much. FMIL is ruining me, and my dad is even at the point where he’s about to call her n say she will be the reason I leave.
What do I do? Somebody help 🙁