bump anxiety…

posted 3 years ago in Pregnancy
Post # 3
79 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

@globalmargaret:  I feel the same way. I’m almost 12 weeks and not showing yet (at least no one but me/DH can tell) and I’m dreading the moment my body starts sharing the information with anyone who looks at me. Pregnancy is so public! (except for DH who gets to waltz around without it…)

Post # 4
2504 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

@globalmargaret:  To be honest, I am kinda looking forward to the bump, but what I did not anticipate were the other changes….my boobs went from a small A to, I think, close to a C cup. I feel weird and self-conscious about it. I never wear push-up bras or even real bras (just little sport bra type ones, like a 10 year-old would wear haha). It has been a big adjustment for me to feel all curvy since I’ve always had a boyish, athletic body type. I’ve put on weight around my butt and mid-section (plus I’m showing a bit at 15 weeks, at least to people that know me) and it weirds me out. I know it’s normal and healthy and all that, but it still is a change for me. My advice would be to just hide it for as long as you want- maternity clothes are designed to flatter and show off a baby bump, so if you don’t want that just buy things a size or two bigger (although you might just look like you’ve gained weight, which would still make me uncomfortable). I would think of a few standard responses to have prepared for people’s nosy questions. You can politely but dismissively answer their questions, like be nice and smile but make it clear you’re not planning on participating in a discussion with them on something very personal. Good luck!

Post # 5
440 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

@globalmargaret:  Hm…I’m also nine weeks and a private person.  I am not looking forward to the prying questions and people’s opinions about my body.  But I am looking forward to getting a bump for some reason.  This may seem weird but ever since I was 12 I have had recurrent dreams that I’m supposed to be 7-8 months pregnant but have no bump.  The dreams are always anxiety producing and I guess I subconsciously have this feeling that my body isn’t capable of looking pregnant.  So I’m looking forward to it if that makes any sense….

Post # 6
545 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

@globalmargaret:  I’m feeling pretty private about this pregnancy and I like that I’m not showing yet. I plan to quickly deflect any questions I feel are too personal with positive, but vague answers, and I will not share my exact due date, any name contenders, or thoughts about our birth plan.

I will also quickly change the topic by asking others about what’s going on in their lives: “But how about you? Tell me about your job/pet/spouse/vacation/new house/wedding/lunch choice/whatever to get the conversation off me!” Most people really, really like talking about themselves. 😉

Post # 7
11772 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: May 2013

If it helps, you could show small/carry towards the back! I know I did–People didn’t say anything about my pregnancy until I was 32 weeks. It was still an “Is she/Isn’t she” question, and people won’t say anything if they’re not sure!

Also, I have only had four strangers ask to touch my bump in 38 weeks! So there’s that.

Post # 8
2086 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

I also hate having attention drawn to me. I’m 15 weeks now and just starting to get bigger, but I actually do want a growing bump for the sake of it being a reminder that the baby is growing normally. The attention from it I could definitely do without though 🙂 I know it is a fun and exciting thing to have a shower too but part of me is dreading it because I’m just remembering back to my bridal shower when I felt so uncomfortable being surrounded by people staring at me. I think it would be a different story if I was surrounded by people I knew well, but my husband’s side of the family dominates in size and they’re not people we’re close with at all but my MIL insists they be a part of these types of things despite us not really knowing them. She is pretty in denial about things like that. We just went to a huge family Christmas party for his side of the family and my husband asked her who some people were and she was like “How do you not know your cousins?? You grew up with them!” Hence what I mean when I say she’s totally in denial, because my husband was like “Just because we’re in the same age range doesn’t mean that I grew up with them, I see these people once a year at most!”

Post # 9
4827 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: June 2013 - Upstate NY

@globalmargaret:  awww hun!! Pregnancy is such a beautiful thing, don’t feel shy or embarrassed!

Post # 10
863 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

@globalmargaret:  that was one thing that I really hated about being pregnant – everyone everywhere all the time commenting about the pregnancy, asking about it, giving advice. I especially hated it at work with clients who would never ask a personal question normally having personal conversations with me.  I don’t like being the centre of attention at all, so I found it exhausting. The upside is that once you have the baby, everyone directs 100 percent of their attention towards the baby and not at you anymore! So the baby is like an attention buffer. And some women struggle with going from being the centre of attention to being completely ignored, but for us attention haters, it’s bliss! 

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