Post # 1
Buying a home is going to be the death of me! I am a major planner and I like to be in control of things. So naturally, Fiance is the exact opposite. Anyway, we really want to buy a home soon, and I know we will. But he is the one with the down payment and he wants to go through one of his dad’s contacts to get a mortgage, and he has been saying for weeks he will contact his dad and get a bank statement, but hasn’t.
So there is literally NOTHING I can do to move this process along. Considering he is the one who initially was insistent on buying a home, I don’t understand why he’s dragging his feet.
I finally told him that we will have to agree on dates by which we will reach certain points (meeting with a bank for a mortgage, finding a real estate agent, etc.) and he said we will do everything by the end of January. I know it will work out in the end, I just don’t know when that will be!
By The Way – I am very grateful for him contributing the down payment, and I don’t want to sound ungrateful, because I know that I am so lucky to be in this position. I just wish we hadn’t started talking about buying (and looking at places) so soon if he wasn’t going to be gung ho about the process.
Post # 3
Grrr that sounds so frustrating. I would just get on the phone and get the ball rolling when you are both home. I would suggest getting all your paperwork together now 2 years of tax returns w-2s paystubs and bank statements together now. They will ask for so much info and when you think you’re done they come back for more. Good luck and give him a little kick in the right direction
Post # 4
I would start doing some of the other stuff, you can at least start meeting with a realtor. Maybe that will light a fire under him knowing you are going to start looking at houses!
Post # 5
@lpisanelli: What other paperwork do you need? I don’t even know where to begin. Ugh. I suggested putting off buying a place until we’re done with the wedding, but he still wants to proceed. Wtf.
Post # 6
As excited as you are, and as much as he says he wants to do, I think you can talk to him about it, but should not push him. Are you guys renting now?? Is there a true deadline to buying a house before a lease is up or in time for the wedding? Is he truely ready, or just saying that he wants it right now. As the person that held the downpayment when my husband and I bought, I think I would have been pretty upset at him if he tried to push me along the process to buy if I were not 100% gung ho about it and ready. It’s a big move and a lot of money to shell out.
Post # 7
I@pinkshoes: We could keep renting, but we want more space, and he is the one who first said that we’re wasting our money by renting (ie not building equity). I just can’t stand the mixed signals. I’m not bringing it up again, I’ve decided. We can talk about it when he feels ready.