Post # 1
Hi ladies, I’m in need of more sound advice please!
FI and I were getting numbers sorted for the venue yesterday and he wrote his list of guests out. On it, near the top, is a girl he used to be really good friends with, definitely used to be very attracted to, and who is, annoyingly, very attractive. She’s lovely, but makes me feel paranoid and a little bit inferior….do I have any right to say I don’t want her there, given that they have been good friends, just because I’m uncomfortable with it? I can take any brutal responses!
Post # 3
I think that you need to sit down with your FI and tell him exactly what you just told us but in a bit more detail about your paranoia and inferiority complex about her. Maybe you just need to get to know this girl a bit more. But remember just cuz shes hot doesnt mean she hold his heart (you hold that)
Post # 4
I agree with solstice that you should just sit down and talk with your FI. Honestly it is the best way. Don’t make your insecurities about his friend though, be honest and tell him how being around her can make you feel. I have felt like this before about a couple girls (who I am now friends with myself), and just talking to my husband about it made me feel a lot better. I don’t know why they made me feel the way they did, he wasn’t interested in them and they weren’t in him. Just talk to him and I bet he will make you see that you are the only person that he has eyes for!
Post # 5
I would talk to him as well. I have had this conversation with my FI a couple of times about certain people. It’s interesting because I will see a pretty girl and think he’s checking her out and I’ll be like what are you staring at??? and he will say something hilarious like “her hair is greasy” or “her teeth are huge”. There’s a reason he’s not attracted to her and is attracted to you. 🙂
Post # 6
Let her eat her heart out! He’s marrying you
If they were good friends, yet nothing went on with them, I think you should allow it. There’s very few goodbyes as absolute as marrying in front of an old crush! Plus, you wouldn’t want her to know you’re insecure over her! (Though you have nothing to worry about it!)
Post # 7
If his penis has never been in her vag, I think you’re good to go and as Vitsippa said, just let her eat her heart out.
If they have had sex? I would talk to you FI and tell him how you feel and go from there.
Post # 8
@Oneeleven: LOL basicially what she said.
Not a big deal being insecure. It is a big deal if you make it he focus of you day. There is no way any other woman is going to have your fiances attention on his wedding day, come on. Thats silly.
Post # 9
thanks ladies….think i needed people to tell me to just get over it. I don’t want him to see me as insecure. Nor put in his mind that she’s attractive again lol. Oneeleven…..lol, he says no and I have to believe him! Think I just need to relax and let her come and feel pretty myself on the day!
I have to say, this forum is a God send. I’ve never before had a place where I can rant/vent/sound stupid and people are just honest without judging.
Thank you ladies…again!