Post # 1
Fellow ladies-in-waiting I beg your indulgence as I snivel, pout and whine for a few minutes. I’m tired, feeling stressed and flying down to South Carolina tomorrow morning to see my very ill grandfather for probably the last time.
My birthday is two weeks from this Sunday and God help me, I’m going to be 35. Ouch. My SO and I have been talking about getting engaged on and off for the last 6 months, seriously talking about it for roughly 2 months and had a major league, up all night discussion about 2 weeks ago. We’re going to be on vacation over my birthday and I freely admit that I had some major hopes – expectations even – of him proposing on my birthday. Going off what he said in the recent all-nighter (“I don’t think I’m going to be ready by then” Fine. Whatever.) I’m coming to terms with the fact that he most likely won’t.
That said – he had the nerve to ask me what I want for my birthday last night. To my eternal humiliation, I felt my face sort of crumple up, I started crying and said “What the heck do you THINK I want for my birthday?!”
Part of me knows he meant to be sweet and kind and loving. Part of me wants to beat him around the head and shoulders with a jewelry store catalog and a copy of “Why Men Marry Bitches”. I’m tired of waiting, I’m tired of wondering what the hell the hold up is, I tired of being patient and reasonable. I want a proposal and I want him to mean it with all his heart. I want him to want to marry me. Simple, right? At least it seems like it should be. Why in the heck does this have to be so complicated?!
Post # 3
🙁 I know how you feel! I actually told my bf not to get me anything for my birthday last May. Despite my best efforts, I *always* get my hopes up. So, I just told him I wanted him to use his money on something for our house instead of spending it on me. We went out to dinner and had a few drinks then rented a movie, so it was still a really great day 🙂
Post # 4
@lilybee: The crazy thing is I really don’t need or want anything! We’re already going on vacation. I really don’t enjoy shopping for clothes, I totally missed the female shoe buying gene and I already have two iPods, a laptop and a cell phone! We merged households last year so we already have more “stuff” than we need. Okay, how about new bath towels and living room curtains? Not exactly a proposal and a ring but what can you do?
Post # 5
I know how you feel and this is the perfect place to vent! My SO and I had a talk like this last night where I cried. I hated I cried, but it just came out of nowhere. We got through it all and I feel a lot better and positive. Maybe because I got it out instead of hiding it. *shrugs*
I’m very sorry about your grandfather’s illness.
Post # 7
“I’m tired of waiting, I’m tired of wondering what the hell the hold up is, I tired of being patient and reasonable.”
Man oh man… I think that Every. Single. Day. Eventually you just break down and cry. It’s hard not to! It’s great having websites like this to vent on. Men like to have things spelled out for them… Seriously. If you want a ring for your birthday, then tell him that you want a ring for your birthday! He can’t get mad… After all, he asked what you wanted, right? Never ask a guy to surprise you because 9 times out of 10 you will be disappointed. Take my b-day last year for example: My b/f asked me what I wanted and I said: “I don’t know… Surprise me!” You know what I got? Nothing. He got me one of those cards that play music and we went for dinner. We ALWAYS go out for dinner so it was no big deal at all. But he got me NOTHING. No gift card to a store, no flowers… NOTHING. I balled my eyes out! He didn’t even buy me a drink when we went out with friends later that night.
So! My point is: If you want something, tell him exactly what you want. That way he can’t turn around and say that you never said anything. You know what you want, and if you can’t get it here, then move onto someone who CAN. Sorry for the harsh advice… I’m just trying to help out and be honest 🙂
Post # 9
Thanks for the support ladies! It really helps to have a place to come vent with women who know what I’m going through. I’m a bit older than some of the “waiting ladies” so all of my girlfriends are married. Even my younger sister has been married for 11 years!
@Gwen von D: Trust me, I let him know I want a ring in no uncertain terms. 🙂 I just don’t know if that is in the cards in the next two weeks.On the other hand, I’ll be gone for a week so maybe it will hit him right between the eyes that he misses me like crazy and he needs to get his butt in gear. I can dream, right?
I’m about to sign off the boards for a week or so. My mom tells me my grandparents only have dial-up service so I’m going to have to restrict my internet time to checking e-mail only.
Have a great week everyone! I saw a few “I’m engaged!” posts when I logged on, so here’s hoping there are a lot more when I get back.
Post # 10
@Ms. Pink Scrubs: Fingers crossed he realises how much he can’t live without you!
Post # 11
Good luck! Have a good trip! We’ll miss you….
I’m glad you got it out as well, we need to vent.
@Gwen von D: You are absolutely right, you’ve gotta tell them what you want!
I’m stupid, I told my BF I wanted these concert tix for my birthday, and he got them, and flights, and arranged a nice weekend for my birthday. I should have asked for a ring! Dammit.