Can I Prompt MOH to Plan a Bach?

posted 3 years ago in Bridesmaids
  • poll: For BM with a MOH dragging her feet and a bride-to-be who really would like a bachelorette party...
    Leave it alone; let the MOH do whatever she decides to do. : (3 votes)
    10 %
    Encourage the MOH to begin planning in a one-on-one setting : (5 votes)
    17 %
    Crowd-source/initiate planning with the bridal party... even if it means going over the MOH's head. : (19 votes)
    66 %
    other : (2 votes)
    7 %
  • Post # 2
    Member
    1498 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: May 2014

    anonybee2015:  If her sister isn’t interested in planning, you should take over and plan something for her.

    Maybe send her a quick message, saying you’d like to take over planning the bachelorette.  It doesn’t seem like something the sister is into doing anyway.  Some other BM’s and I had to do this recently for a friend’s wedding.  The MOH sister literally did not do ONE thing.

    Post # 3
    Member
    25 posts
    Newbee
    • Wedding: August 2014

    anonybee2015:  I’d say it’s more than fine to take over– it sounds like everyone involved (MOH, bride-to-be, other bridesmaids) would appreciate it. My MOH is more of a homebody, so she’s planning my shower, but another more party-friendly bridesmaid is planning bachelorette. 

    Post # 6
    Member
    9529 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: August 2013

    I think you could try some prompting of the MOH, but at the end of the day I think your options are to leave it alone or be willing to take over planning. A bachelorette party doesn’t have to be anything complicated and requiring reservations. Mine was dinner out with my girls and then back to our hotel suite for games and drinks and chick flicks. And it was awesome. If you have a date that’re the most important thing. Maybe just make some suggestions to the MOH and ask if she needs help.

    Post # 7
    Member
    42460 posts
    Honey Beekeeper
    • Wedding: November 1999

    Rather than just take over, I would contact the MOH and ask if she has finalized any details for the party. If not, then I would volunteer to assume responsibility for the planning.

    Post # 8
    Member
    1881 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: October 2014

    Yep, go ahead and just start planning it. Clearly this girl just doesn’t really get the whole planning process. You could check w the bride and make sure she doesn’t mind, but I’m sure she’ll be grateful!

    Post # 9
    Member
    287 posts
    Helper bee

    The first time I was ever a MOH (2011) I had someone take over the Bachelorette planning. It wasn’t really a situation like this, I had been starting to plan things and we were still months away from the big day. I started getting phone calls and emails from some mutual friends of the brides and mine (girls who weren’t even bridesmaids) telling me they were thinking about venues and activities and gifts for guests..

    At first I was pretty offended, because it was as if they were taking over and just assuming I wasn’t doing anything. Admittedly, I hadn’t shared any of my ideas with them.

    But then I realized that I was already spending money and a lot of time on the Bridal shower and here were two girls willing to do the whole Bachelorette for me.. .and they WANTED to. So I just sat back and let them take over.

    Win win.

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