Post # 1
Ok, so maybe I’m being a little overly sensitive today, but I just had a co-worker email me and in the re: line it said “What color is your wedding dress?” and in the body of the e-mail it asked, “is it white or cream? Can I wear cream to your wedding?”
Now this person is in her 40’s and should know better, in my opinion. I mean WTF???
Like I said, maybe I am just a little overly sensitive today but still, that got me.
Post # 3
I wouldn’t want someone wearing cream either. I’m going to a wedding in July and have a great summery eyelet dress I would love to wear…but it’s white so it’s a heck no!
Post # 4
UGH! I’m sorry but I feel like that is the day the bride gets to wear white/ivory. So JUST DON’T! It’s not that hard! Don’t wear white, don’t wear ivory, don’t wear cream or anything close to them!
Post # 5
Not ok. That would irritate me too.
Post # 6
- Wedding: July 2012 - The Gables Inn, Santa Rosa, CA
I’d be annoyed too– just send her a polite reply stating you would prefer if she didn’t. She should get the hint.
Post # 7
- Wedding: October 2011 - Bed & Breakfast
Mr. Lk’s gramma wore a creamy/champagne-y color to our wedding. I’m pretty sure everyone still knew that I was the bride. And she looked awesome in her outfit!
Post # 8
@Mrs.DsBeeloved: you could always send a snarky reply telling her you cant distinguish colors well and they look the same so you have no idea.
but seriously, if she has to ask, she probably knows its not a good idea.
Post # 9
cream or white, still white…so I vote no.
People have different preference. I can stand people wearing white, but in floral….just no plain white.
and I just realized someone went to my friend’s wedding with a pure white cocktail dress with tiny black belt. The bride probably didn’t mind but still…
I always wonder why people wear white to clash with the bride’s dress. Aside from the fact you don’t want to steal the spotlight, I also want to look good in photos as guest, why not pick something in other color? :/
Post # 10
Lol, you are not be overly sensitive
The Clod in your office is being highly INSENSITIVE
Really, someone over 40 somehow NEEDS to send such an email to the Bride ??
Obviously, she knows the Rule of Etiquette (or has heard of it), or she wouldn’t have sent it …
I’d seriously wonder if she isn’t someone who is wanting to set you up for a melt-down… and I do think there are people out there who get their jollies out of “setting the Bride a kilter”
Lol, anyway to dis-invite said Co-Worker ?????
(Ok that last part was pure evil… but hey I am a Bride-2-B too, so I think we need to stick together when these Etiquette-Be-Damned Clowns raise their ugly heads)
Short of that, I’d send her an email back that says… NO
White, Cream and ___ (Teal – Peacock – Hot Pink… whatever you have) are your Wedding Colours. So best to be looking for something else for herself.
No lie there…
Post # 11
@lovekiss: for elderly, I will cut them some slacks…especially family. I don’t want them to go out and buy another dress just for my wedding.
But for other guests, I would prefer they don’t wear plain white, or similar colors with no other colors on their dress.
Post # 12
@This Time Round: hehe…dis-invite sounds awesome! lol
Seriously, I agree with you. If she had to send an email to ask, obviously she knows it’s not okay to wear white to wedding.
Post # 13
This is another one of the wedding etiquette rules I really wish would die quickly. No one is going to mistake another woman in a white dress for the bride except maybe (MAYBE) at a very casual wedding, and even then, the bride is still going to stand out and still be the center of attention. I just see it as such a minor and unimportant detail that I can’t really get my head around why it causes as much stress as it does.
But that’s just me…
Post # 14
Slightly off topic, but when I went to my fairly new (now very ex) bf’s sister’s afternoon garden wedding a few years ago I wore a lovely strapless chocolate brown knee length cocktail dress…which happened to be almost EXACTLY the same as the dress the bridesmaids were in. I will never forget the horror I felt when I saw them walking down the path. This post reminded me of it. Ugh!
Post # 15
Here is what I did, I told her that my dress was ivory which was BOTH and then asked her what she wanted to wear that was cream. She said a cream multilayer cocktail dress with a black sash. So I replied:
“Oh, please don’t take this the wrong way, but by standard, you are not supposed to wear cream or white to a wedding 🙂 That is like breaking the cardinal rule! I would prefer it if you didn’t wear something that color!”
She said “Ok, I knew you couldnt wear white, but I wasnt sure about cream…”
I really like this co-worker, but she’s recently gotten engaged after a very quick courtship and an even quicker recovery from an ex so I think its the attitude of “I’m engaged too! I get to wear white also!” type of attitude. You know the kind I’m talking about….
Post # 16
@fishbone: Do I think it should stress people out, no. Do I see the point, yeah kind of. With the array of colors out there why do guests have to wear white? There are tons of other options and with one color pallete elminated it isn’t like they are up against the wall so to speak.
I made it clear to my guests that asked…I don’t care what color you wear just nothing cream/white. I’m not an overaly traditional person but I did want to stick to that for some reason. My cousin’s stepmother wore cream from head to toe and while no one certainly mistook her as the bride it DID stand out in photos so that she was visually in competition with the bride. That is what I wanted to avoid.