(Closed) can the groom attend the bridal shower?

posted 8 years ago in Etiquette
  • poll: bridal showers for females only?
    female thing only no men allowed : (6 votes)
    17 %
    a Co-ED thing men can come too : (10 votes)
    29 %
    set your own trend times are changing : (19 votes)
    54 %
  • Post # 3
    1523 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: September 2010

    You can do a co-ed shower, but the men will probably be bored! The traditional reason for a shower was to do something nice for the bride and shower her with gifts.

    My Fiance and his Dad showed up at the end of my shower. They chatted with guests and then helped me take presents to the car. Before that, they were playing 9 holes of golf and didn’t want to attend the whole shower.

    Post # 4
    3219 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: November 2010

    FH didnt want anything to do with the shower, its a BRIDAL shower not a bride & groom shower.

    I have been to a few Jack & Jill showers. But I like the all girl showers better. Its more fun and you get to do girly stuff. Most men want nothing to do with a shower and would be bored outa their minds.

    Post # 5
    7975 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper

    My Fiance, my dad and my Future Father-In-Law came to our shower. They thought they’d be bored (and joked about leaving to go play pool) but afterwards, J told me how much fun he’d had.

    It was both of our families, and 70% of the guests were his cousins and aunts, whom I’d never met before, plus I HATE being the center of attention. My aunts (who planned the shower) knew the guys would be there, and did gender neutral games – totally fine by me, since I’m not a big fan of TP Bride anyway!

    It went great, and I can’t imagine how awkward/uncomfortable it would have been for me had he not been there.

    Post # 6
    447 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: July 2009

    We had a co-ed shower, and it was actually a lot of fun. It was a murder mystery game, and everyone got to go around questioning suspects. There was an all dessert buffet centered around one of my favorite mystery series. Everyone was telling me how much they loved it.

    Post # 7
    295 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: October 2010 - The Atlantic Beach Club

    Mr. S came to both Bridal showers, but they were only women other than him, which is normal in my area. People in Jersey thought it was strange that he came. But in both of our areas we’ve seen co-ed showers, which is totally becoming more popular.

    Post # 8
    252 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: July 2011

    We’re def. doing a co-ed shower. So many great guys in our families, they’re such a hoot at parties it wouldn’t be the same without them. Plus Future Father-In-Law loves parties and felt left out the festivities at FBIL’s Fiancee’s bridal shower which was only for girls. I don’t want anyone to feel left out. We love everyone and want to include everyone in the festivities!!

    Post # 9
    435 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: December 2010

    I don’t know one guy who honestly wants to go to a wedding shower.  Females only for mine, and for most of my friends.

    Post # 10
    171 posts
    Blushing bee

    My shower guests were only women  but my Fiance ate lunch with us and opened presents. He spent the rest of the time in the restaurant’s bar watching a baseball game on TV. 

    Post # 11
    2083 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: May 2010

    For us the guests were all women, but my husband did come after lunch to sit down and open all of the presents with me. I’m really glad he did though, it was nice to have him there and I think a lot of the people were glad he could come too (like the people from his side of the family). Plus, man would it have been overwhelming to open those gifts on my own!

    Post # 12
    16217 posts
    Honey Beekeeper

    I attended a shower once where the groom was present just to play a “Newlywed Game” type of thing. Other than that, he hid in the basement with the bride’s dad. 🙂

    Post # 13
    572 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: September 2011

    First off yes, the groom can go, but I believe then it would be considered a wedding shower. A bridal shower is typically held for the bride. The quest list will include her girl friends and family (females). A wedding shower is held for both the bride and the groom and guests from both sexes are invited. This guest list can include family or friends of either the bride or groom.  

    However, I dont know of any men that would look forward to or want to go to a wedding shower, that’s why I think its best to keep it a girl thing.  If you really want him to be included, why don’t you ask him if he would like to come.  If so, then you can have him come for a little while (like to open gifts).

    Post # 14
    5823 posts
    Bee Keeper

    My family would laugh at the whole “girls only” thing.  It’s never been that way in our family.  The men are always invited.  They just choose not to come.  But by being invited they know exactly when they will all be free to go do something fun with each other.  It’s typically a male bonding moment for the hubby-to-be.

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