Post # 1
My mother and I moved in with my grandmother about 2 years ago when she became very ill. We handle all the bills, food and upkeep of the house and property. Well my uncle, my grandmother’s youngest, is a druggie and has been freeloading off us for the last several months. At first, my mother was ok with him staying because he’s on welfare (I still don’t know why) and was offering his food stamps to buy groceries for the house, as well as cleaning. Fast forward to about 3 months ago and he magically no longer gets food stamps, lays in bed all day and drug paraphernalia starts popping up (cut up strays, used needles but his diabetic medication remains unopened and most recently burned kitchen spoons). There is a child in the house so this was a major no and crossed every line we had! My grandmother is hiding her money because she knows he will steal it. We (my mother and I) talk to her and bring it up ALL the time that she needs to put him out. We show her the evidence, the back of spoons don’t just burn themselves, but she won’t tell him to pack his bags. It’s frustrating beyond belief! We can’t leave because she needs us to take care of her and we’d never put her in a nursing home. Legally the house is still my grandmother’s but she isn’t willing to do what needs to be done. My mother would lose her commercial license and I’d be kicked out of my internship if drugs were discovered in our house. Basically, is there anyway we can legally put him out without my grandmother doing it and absolving her of guilt? Like a power of attorney or something?
Post # 2
If you have power of attorney and can show cause, most likely you could.
Post # 3
I believe you could if you had power of attorney, but that’s not always an easy thing to get if your grandmother is not willing. I’d talk to a lawyer.
Post # 4
- Wedding: Royal Park Hotel
uncltredpearl: Hmmm with drugs and a child couldn’t you have him arrested and file a restraining order?
Post # 5
Yeah, couldn’t you just drop an anonymous tip to the police?
Post # 6
Tenants have a lot of rights, and even without a lease it can be very difficult to evict someone (depending on your state). Trying to evict him can potentially be a very difficult process. If I were in your situation, I would tell him he as 24 hours to get out or the cops would be called about his drug problem.
Post # 7
Same as PP, I’d give him the ultimatum; get out or we’ll call the cops.
Post # 8
You would have to get legal powers over your grandmother’s affairs. Then you could solve the problem. The only issue is that your uncle could contest your powers on the grounds that your mother exerted undue pressure on your grandmother to get full legal powers and effectively “write him out” of his mother’s decisions.
Is there any downside to calling the police and having them arrest him?
Post # 9
uncltredpearl: Well, you have to take care of the child too. If G-ma is so determined NOT to kick out the druggie uncle, I’d make the child my priority and move out. Could you live close by and visit during the day? What about if you and the child move out and your mother stays?
I’ve heard kicking someone out of a house–like a tenant or even SQUATTER–is extremely hard to do. Sorry I can’t offer any legit legal advice though.
Post # 10
I think we may go the route of getting legal power over her affairs then issue him an ultimatum. Threatening to call the cops now would depend on if we could “catch” him which is very hard. He’s extremely sneaky and when they ask the homeowner if she wants him gone she won’t say anything or “I don’t care”. My grandmother’s health is getting progressively worse very quickly. She knows we are the only ones who can do anything for her in terms of doctor appointments, hospital stays, signing papers, etc. Convicing her to sign POA shouldn’t be too hard. The child is my niece who my mother has custody of and while I could easily pick up and go, I can’t leave my mom in that situation unassisted. It’s a lot to deal with and very stressful. This will sound insensitive, but when we first suspected he was using again we were honestly going to wait until my grandmother passed (since the house will be left to one of us) to put him out. His drug use progressed a lot faster than either of us imagined it would. I know he had substance abuse problems dating back to the eighties which is why my grandfather has absolutely nothing to do with him but I didn’t know it was this bad.