- 6 years ago
- Wedding: October 2012
Hello, Fellow Bees!
My wedding is October 6th of this year, and my fiancé and I are at our wits end.
We got engaged December last year, and started the ball rolling on planning. Well, 8 months later, we have a few medium/minor details confirmed, which is good – however, we recently had to cancel the Reception venue we had because of the poor customer service. So, now we’re looking around the area for ANYTHING.
I’ll spare you the details, but here are a few highlights of the last 8 months:
– my sister agreed to be the MoH, but stepped out ENTIRELY of the wedding party because of something my fiancé posted on Facebook that DID need to be said (it wasn’t directed at her, she merely took offense to it)
– my parents have never quite liked my fiancé. They’ve had good times together, but he lives 1.5 hours away, so they haven’t all been able to get to know each other properly. So, there’s always a little tension talking about wedding plans.
– I still live at home, and the agreement was that if we get married October 6th, my parents will let me live there until October 1 to save money – then, I’m up to my fiancés hometown to live with him after we get married. When we realized we couldn’t afford the wedding about 1.5 months ago (my fiancé got a concussion playing hockey in his beer league – mild, but he was out of work for nearly two months, and we had to use the wedding fund to stay afloat). We suggested moving the wedding back, but my parents reminded me of that proviso, and I’d have to leave the house right then, essentially. So, we’re kinda stuck with the date now
– Bridesmaids. Can’t live with ‘em, can’t live without ‘em.
– my parents will be contributing $10,000 after all is said and done. However, about $1000 is going/has gone to my dress, jewellery, and possibly flowers, the rest going to my Student Loan. So, no help to the wedding in any other way
– my wonderful future Mother-in-Law held a Surprise Jack and Jill Shower for us a few weekends ago, a small, fun event. My fiancé was asked about who to invite, and because it was in a town roughly 2ish hours away from me, not many of our friends would have been able to make it. I’m not really sure how, but my parents weren’t even invited. Please don’t be mean in your replies to my fiancé or mother-in-law – I’m still trying to figure out what happened. I only bring this up to say that now my parents are insulted, so that just adds to the dung pile
– the church we’re holding the ceremony at is the one my fiancé and I attend, so they’ll do the Ceremony for free, which is awesome. They also offered to help us out by having a little finger food/coffee/tea/punch “Reception” to deflect costs, then we can go out after and do whatever we want. Since everyone would be there, we figured do the speeches then as well. Well, my parents do not care for this (we’d look like beggers, charity-cases, using the chapel, etc) and if we did do that, they’d leave after the ceremony
I think those are the main highlights – it’s been nothing but a bumpy ride. I know that wedding planning is stressful, but I’m thinking it shouldn’t actually be hurtful and so stressful that I’m breaking my own diet on a weekly basis (Weight Watchers, so I’m paying to lose weight, and essentially wasting more money).
So, my question, Bees – at this point, all I want now is a Ceremony (traditional, blah blah blah), and literally to just go home with my husband, and not go out at all. I’m sure that’ll change, but how horrible would it be if we had the Ceremony, and essentially disappeared? Most to all of the joy has been sucked out of the day already, and I cannot fathom having any celebrations. Yes, I’m probably holding quite the pity party, but has anyone else been in this situation? Most of our guests are out of town, too, so without a Reception to keep them there, it’d be a little unfair for them to travel for a half-hour ceremony…
Maybe I just needed to vent 🙂 Regardless, this whole thing sucks!!