- 8 years ago
- Wedding: September 2010
My Fi and I just got into a fight. A caterer we’re suppose to meet with tomorrow e-mailed to say they don’t have adequate time to prepare for our taste test tomorrow (a meeting we set up over 3 weeks ago!!!) and I got upset (we have not, in our 11 month engagement so far, met with a single caterer, dj, florist, baker, etc). My FI was all “whatever” about it and I went off about how he’s no help what-so-ever (its true. He wants veto power on my ideas and my efforts, but has not helped with a single detail to date) and I am doing this whole wedding on my own and how I feel all this pressure because of that and because we’re less the 9 months out with NO ONE BOOKED (except the photographer, who is only booked because he’s a friend…). I said that i don’t want to be angry or stressed on our wedding day so things need to get done in a timely manner and a bunch of other stuff. I know if things are left to the last minute, I’m going to have a melt down on my wedding day.
His response? I am the one causing problems by insisting on having a reception, which is why no one is helping me. We don’t need a caterer, hall, music, flowers, or a reception. In fact, let’s cancel everything EXCEPT the church ceremony because the rest is stupid and expensive and wasteful. In fact, let’s skip any kind of honeymoon too. And while we are at it, let’s get married in jeans and t-shirts because special clothes are stupid too. Wait, no, let’s get rid of the guests as well! Our parents can come in jeans and t-shirts to an undecorated ceremony where we dress like we do every single other day of the week and celebrate in no way whatsoever with no one else. No reception, no honeymoon, no effort in anyway to mark this day as special and apart from any other day in our lives.
I was (and am still!) so upset I told him to go away and leave me alone. I said I’d rather talk to people online then him right now because he doesn’t understand and has never made an effort to. He just walked away. I am hurt and pissed off. I was the one who wanted to elope originally. He was the one who said he refused to do that, as only a Catholic ceremony in a church here in Milwaukee is good enough for him. I figure that if i have to go through becoming a member of a church of a religion which believes in a god I have no belief in (atheist here) and then go through a religious ceremony I don’t give two oranges about, then I gosh darn well deserve a party for that!
Am I crazy to want to celebrate our getting married with our close friends and family? That’s how he and everyone else consistently makes me feel and I am F
tired of it!