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Cancelling / Postponing Wedding

posted 4 months ago in Emotional
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    carothkj    February 23, 2012  

    Hi Bees, 

    I really need your advice / help on the current situation.  My FH and I are really thinking about cancelling the wedding.  The cancelation of the wedding has nothing to do with us not wanting to get married or being together.  Honestly we simply want to take the financial loss with deposits and elope.  I could go through the whole story about why we are feeling this way, but the story would go on and on.  I will put a few points down while trying to condense them.

    Thank you in advance for all your help!

    - First I never really wanted a wedding in the first place, but my FH wanted to do so for his family (he was really close with his aunts when he was younger).  So we talked a lot about it and decided to go a semi-traditional route.  After that I did start to get excited about the idea of having both sides of the family involved in the planning and just to have a special day for us.  However, it has became no where near that!  My future mother inlaw has been treating us very poorly, which to me was a surprise but to the rest of the family I guess it is not un-normal for her to treat people like this.  She actually has not talked to us in months, no longer is contributing anything to the wedding financially or emotionally.  She also was suppose to do our Save the Dates and Invitations (which she volunteered to do, because that is her type of thing) and when she stopped talking to us...she also left us hanging with the Save the Dates.  We were forced to rush around and try to find someone to design them in a month of when we wanted to get them out.  

    Not only is the issue of my future mother inlaw weighing on us, but everyone is both of our families seem to add their 2 cents everywhere because we are not having the complete traditional wedding.  We are doing a small intimate ceremony with only the immediate family memeber.  We are not having bridemaids or groomsman, but  rather we each have a couple on the side of us that is the couple.  It is to resemble our closest couple we look up to, to find guidance of what we want to strive for in our marriage.  However, each family seems to be upset about the ceremony choice and that we are having it where we live...which may I add is the same distance between my family and his.  An hour drive for both!  

    I am not close with my extended family, so honestly I don't think a lot of them will come.  Or at least not come in a supporting / loving manner, but rather forced or obligated.  

    What do you think?  Should we elope and go on a great honeymoon with the $ we have already saved??

     

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