Post # 1
My parents get a letter yesterday in the mail addressed to me. I go over and read…
— We are so happy to hear of your upcoming wedding. We will be in Charleston for a family vacation that same weekend and plan to join in your celebration. Don’t worry about getting us the details, Gladys copied the invitation. —
signed, 6 names I don’t know. WHO THE $%&#%& ARE THESE PEOPLE?!
I call FH in a rage, we’ve already had issues with his invite list and his family thinking its ok to invite the entire town. Turns out, Gladys is a friend of FH’s grandma. I didn’t want Gladys invited in the first place as neither FH or I know her but his g-ma gave him a guilt trip about how her husband just died and she really wants to take a trip. So Gladys RSVPS and adds 2 people!! Errrr. (Her grandaughter and grandaughters boyfriend). I get over that but NOW THIS! Turns out that the six people are Gladys next door neighbors and FH’s g-ma told her to invite them. I told him to call his grandma asap and tell her these people were not allowed to come.
He calls her and she basically says, “Well I hope I don’t forget to do that before the wedding.” WTF?!?! She has no plans to tell them. So I get home and tell FH to call his parents and get their number because I WILL CALL THEM. FH calls his parents (G-ma seemed to have “misplaced” the number) and they again try to guilt him into just allowing these people to be invited. So I get on the phone and tell them very nicely that I am going to feel very uncomfortable having 9 people I don’t know and that have no connection to me at the wedding. I can deal with a few extra but 9 complete strangers? Future Mother-In-Law responds with, “well our family is going to feel uncomfortable with the alcohol being served, but we’re getting passed it.” WHHAAAATTT?!?!?!?!? TWO DIFFERENT ISSUES LADY!
Then the conversation just keeps getting worse with her saying that we can take the money out of the flower budget…huh? You said you weren’t paying for the flowers but now you are because you really won’t have to? (That was an entire other issue) I was soooo confused, I finally just handed the phone back to FH and said, “those people better not show up and tell your parents to pay for the damn flowers”
Ladies I don’t even know what to say. I’m exhausted from the wedding issues. I keep telling myself it doesn’t matter but it does. His family just makes everything so difficult. 🙁
Post # 3
I’d be on fire. 9 people is a LOT of extra money!! I’m sorry. 🙁
Post # 4
That would make me SO mad.
At this point I’d hire security and give them a list of invited guests and make everyone show ID at the door. If you aren’t on the list, you don’t get in.
That is absurd that your FI’s family is being so rude about the whole thing.
Post # 5
Gahhhhh!!!! Make your Fiance take care of it and slowly walk away!!!!
Post # 6
Holy Crap, I would be livid!!! I’d be telling future grandma to fork up some major cash for their plates!! WTF? Who does this? I got several “extra” people coming that I do not know…a couple here and there for certain guests….but NOT NINE!!
Your FH needs to step up and get on this asap!!!
Post # 7
I’m sorry but that would be a no-go for me. Your Fiance needs to learn to be firm. HIS family is causing the issues and HE needs to be the one to very firmly tell them that it’s not happening. The fact that they obviously KNOW that what they are doing goes against what you and your Fiance wants would really send my temper through the roof. If the return address is on that letter, I would send them one right back. “Sorry, but you guys aren’t invited. Enjoy your vacation.”
Post # 8
Wow, that is so unbelieveable. I cannot believe that people think it’s just okay to invite whomever to a wedding!
Post # 9
Do you have a return address on the letter you received?
I would sent them back a strongly worded letter that says while you appreciate their enthusiasm you simply do not have space to accommodate NINE MORE PEOPLE and you are sorry to inform them that they cannot attend your wedding.
Post # 10
Wow, this warrants an “oh sh*t!”
I’m not sure how I’d handle this since I wouldn’t want to get off on the wrong foot with the in-laws. I’d say don’t acknowledge the 9 strangers if they show up.
Post # 11
Nine extra people?
Agree with PPs that your Fiance needs to call his nutty family members and make it abundantly clear that you guys are not going to pay however much it costs to feed nine complete strangers.
Post # 12
Hire security and just “misplace” gma’s friend and granddaughter and boyfriend from the list as well. While all of this is going on. .you will be far from it! That is VERY rude! I don’t understand how guests could WANT to go to a wedding of a complete stranger either! it just doesn’t make sense!
Post # 13
I would tell them they have to pay for the extra people if they want them there so badly.
Post # 14
It may not sound like it but FH is trying VERY hard. He didn’t invite any of his friends to the wedding because of his parents list and when he reminded them of that last night his parents and grandma just throw things back in his face. They don’t fight fair and they are so manipulative its ridiculous.
They just threw me a shower and I thought things had gotten soooo much better. I was way off.
Post # 15
@KatNYC2011: No return address and we don’t know the six peoples last name and his parents “don’t remember it” so we can’t get a number or address!
Post # 16
@KatNYC2011: That’s exactly what i was going to suggest.
Dang i thought i had it bad with my husbands hillbilly relatives, they just didn’t show up. Not show up and bring a posse. sheesh