- 8 years ago
- Wedding: September 2010
Here goes my attempt at condensing all the junk I have on my mind, into a nice and relatively small post. The problem is twofold – attempting to have a casual ceremony, and trying not to have a panic attack that there will be so much unwanted attention on me on my wedding day.
My fiancé and I knew we weren’t on the same page about what we wanted our wedding to be like long before we got engaged (me – courthouse, him – big fancy ceremony). We discussed our differences some, but ultimately decided we would discuss it later. Well, now is later, we are getting married in October and we still are on complete opposite pages.
We worked hard to come to a compromise – a small, casual ceremony, with a short reception lunch to follow – no dance. That was fine until his family started freaking out, “*gasp* You need to have a dance!” “You need to have a DJ!” “You need to have boutonnieres!” After much resistance, his family caved with regards to the dance/DJ issue, and I caved regarding having to have a ton of freakin’ flowers, because my Mother-In-Law will pay for those, and I figure it is a relatively small issue.
However, things keep getting brought up that we “must” do because of etiquette, etc. “You MUST have ushers!” “Your grandparents MUST walk down the aisle!” “Your mom MUST walk down the aisle!” (As a side note, my mom loves attention just about as much as me, she doesn’t want to walk down the aisle. She’d rather just be sitting at the front. My fiancé and I are fine with that, but we are concerned how that is going to look that my dad will walk me down the aisle, and his parents will walk down the aisle, but we are leaving my mom out.) Personally, I’d prefer the only people walk down the aisle be my fiancé, the maid of honor and best man, and me and my dad (quite frankly, I’d be okay with me not walking down the aisle at all – but I KNOW that won’t go over well).
At this point, I feel like the only way our wedding is casual is that the guys will be wearing suits rather than tuxes and we won’t be having a dance. I feel like the more casual the ceremony, the less attention it will feel like is on me.
Any suggestions for how to have a chapel ceremony that is more on the casual side? And of course, any advice regarding anxiety is most appreciated.