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Catholic Ceremony Question

posted 1 year ago in Catholic
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    1.
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    Helper bee
    posh_princess    September 24, 2011   MA

    So I'm getting married outside and the bane of a Catholic girls existence is that priests won't go and marry you outside of church. 

    I wish the catholic church would stop this silliness, but in the meantime, does anyone know if I could get married by a Jesuit priest and it be a "real catholic ceremony"?  Do Jesuit Priests even marry people?

    I've been told that if a catholic priest marries you it won't be recognized by the church.  It's not something that bothers me so much as my FI's family.

     
    2.
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    Sugar bee
    GreenEyedMoon    January 14, 2012   Dallas

    Jesuit priests can definitely perform the ceremony.  FI and I probably would have a Jesuit priest perform ours except that of the three we've been close to, one died last fall, one left the priesthood a couple years ago, and the last hasn't actually joined the priesthood yet.

     
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    Helper bee
    AEMalmostK    April 30, 2011  

    Yes, Jesuit priests can marry you, but you're going to have a hard time finding a Jesuit willing to do an outdoor ceremony-- they follow the Roman Catholic rules, just like any other sect.

     
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    Worker bee
    VanCaster    November 11, 2011   La Crosse, WI

    My FI and I have this idea to get married in a Hot Air balloon we both think it is a super romantic and special idea. However I want to be married by a Catholic Priest and I don't think he (my FI) cares either way. I know I won't find a priest who will perform this sacrament outside the church......what should i do? I am thinking just get married in the Church and have a civil ceremony after. I am worried about it costing too much to do both ugh. 

     
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    Bumble bee
    jenbrandner    Aug 7, 2010   Wisconsin

    Well here's the kicker:  all sacraments happen inside the church.

    Actually I just have to ask...  How would your guests be able to witness the ceremony if you two are up in a balloon?  Would you use microphones or something?  LOL

    Otherwise could you arrange to take off in a hot air balloon with a "just married" sign immediately following the ceremony?  Maybe take a photographer up with you and get some great kissing-among-the-clouds shots, and then land in time for the reception.  That would be a good way to kill time during the "Catholic wedding gap" anyway!

     
    6.
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    Bumble bee
    jedeve    August 14, 2010   Montana

    @posh_princess: Jesuit priests are 100% Catholic priests and definitely perform weddings. We were going to get married by a Jesuit priest but he couldn't because of his health.

    It's not 100% true that your marriage won't be recognized if you don't get married by a Catholic priest. You can get what is called a Dispensation from Canonical Form, meaning the Church gives you permission to get married elsewhere and will still consider it valid. You usually have to have a good reason to this though, for instance, if the bride who isn't Catholic wants to get married in her home church.

    BTW, it's a little offensive to call it "silliness." I know it's not easy for brides, especially brides who didn't grow up Catholic, but it is part of our faith! The reason that weddings are done inside of a church is because they are considered community events, open to anyone in the Parish. That doesn't mean you should expect 100 uninvited people, but the symbol is that you are taking part in a parish community, whereas if you got married on a golf course or something, that would definitely be invitation only.

     
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    Worker bee
    angieinphilly    June 25, 2011   Philadelphia

    Jesuits are just a sect of Catholics....just like there are different groups of nuns that are all Catholic nuns.. Unfortunately they wont marry you outside the Church either.  My highschool was run my Franciscans and my college was Jesuit..but they were both Catholic.

     
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    Worker bee
    angieinphilly    June 25, 2011   Philadelphia

    Jesuits are just a sect of Catholics....just like there are different groups of nuns that are all Catholic nuns.. Unfortunately they wont marry you outside the Church either.  My highschool was run my Franciscans and my college was Jesuit..but they were both Catholic.

     
    8.
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    Helper bee
    posh_princess    September 24, 2011   MA

    @jedeve: Not trying to offend, but I do think it's quite silly.  And I am 100% Catholic. I'm not some outsider looking in. I've been baptised, did the whole communion thing, went to CCD & got confirmed.

    Why I think it's silly to not allow a marriage outside of church is the same reason I think it's offensive that they won't go to the bed of a sick and dying person and give last rites.  Granted I know it's two totally different scenerios, but I just wanted you to realize where I'm coming from.

     

    *just waiting for the storm of other angry catholics yelling at me for this response*

     
    9.
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    Blushing bee
    CatholicBee      

    @posh_princess: priests perform last rites bed side all the time.  In fact most hospitals have a priest in the hospital or on call specifically to do that 24/7.

    I think it's silly that some brides call themselves Catholic then care more about the setting for their pictures  than the sacrament, but that's just me.

     
    10.
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    Helper bee
    vabride2011    July 23, 2011  

    @posh_princess: My grandmother had her last rites in her hospital bed.  I'm not sure why you are under the impression that a priest could only perform last rites inside the church.  I'd say that is almost always not done in church.

    That said, if you have a non-church wedding by an ordained minister of another Christian fiath, you can have it recognized by the Catholic Church.  My brother was married outdoors by his wife's Methodist minister and his marriage is recognized.

    Another option, my parents had a small civil ceremony when they were first married.  A few years later, their priest agreed to perform a VERY fast (maybe 3 mins) wedding as part of their weekly mass to make it 'official' in the eyes of the Church.  Talk to your parish priest about whether this might be an option.

     
    11.
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    Sugar bee
    elliestan    October 15, 2011   OK | TX

    OP, if you don't care about the 'silliness' then just get married by some other kind of officiant! I was bummed at first that getting married outside wasn't an option, but after reading about the reasons why and learning about it in pre-cana, it made sense and i'd rather have a catholic ceremony than - as CatholicBee perfectly put it - have a pretty setting for pictures.

     

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