(Closed) Causing a “rift” in the family?

posted 8 years ago in Family
Post # 3
Member
711 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

We had the same problem – my mom comes from 7 my dad from 9. my husbands dad from 7 and his mom from 6. so we did the exact same thing that you are doing – we invited the aunts and uncles but not the cousins (Except for a very very select few of 1st cousins who we were very close with. I had one reply card with extra people on it so I just sent an email out to that family that said something like: “We were so excited to receive your reply the other day in the  mail. Unfortunately due to such large families on both side and a small budget we were unable to incorporate all of the cousins. We hope that you will still be a part of our special day”.

I dont remember the exact wording but it was something like that. The thing is (and i know from having such big families) if you let one do it then it is completely unfair to the rest and that was something that we had to deal with as well.

i almost forgot – the result – that particular family replied and said that they were not able to make it. I was okay with that – I had a great day. the people who loved me where there and I married the man I love. I know its tough getting through this process but I guarantee you’ll get through it and then you will be able to relax. Good luck with everything!

Post # 4
Member
613 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2009

same thing here.  my granny is one of 10 so i invited all of her sisters and brothers but only a few of their children (my parents age) and none of the 2nd cousins (my age).  drama insued.  i got 1 rsvp for +15.  i got another for +7.  i had my granny tell them no.  they got angry and didnt come at all, but no biggie b/c i barely know these people.  they were curtesy invites to my grandma’s sisters + brothers.  nothing more.  a few months ago, i wasnt invited to one of their weddings.  again, who cares.  i wouldnt recognize most of these people. 

Post # 5
Member
2237 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

I do not come from a large family and neither does my FH, but I cannot imagine what would make a person think it’s ok to send an RSVP with a +15!!!!!!!!  THATS RIDICULOUS!!!!!

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