(Closed) Ceremony Reading(s) – Are you having them?

posted 6 years ago in Ceremony
  • poll: Are you having reading(s) during the ceremony?
    Yes : (26 votes)
    79 %
    No : (7 votes)
    21 %
  • Post # 3
    964 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: November 2011

    I am.  The only reason is because I’m trying to find something for some of my Fiance family members to do so that the wedding doesn’t seem onesided.   I’m going to let her pick and I’m just going to approve it.

    Post # 5
    1150 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: August 2011

    I worked in a couple poems that my Boyfriend or Best Friend read during our ceremony. She was very funny and did a fantastic job! 

    Pablo Neruda wrote, ‘if little by little you stop loving me

    I shall stop loving you little by little.’

    He meant it as a threat. 

    He also said ‘But if each day, each hour,

    you feel that you are destined for me…

    if each day a flower

    climbs up to your lips to seek me, in me all that fire is repeated,

    in me nothing is extinguished or forgotten,

    my love feeds on your love

    and as long as you live it will be in your arms

    without leaving mine.’ 

    Now that was a promise.

    As your family and friends, let us say ‘may the promises and threats in your marriage be made with the spirit of Pablo Neruda.’


    Leonard Cohen said, ‘Dance me to your beauty with a burning violin’

    (Don’t do that. Don’t attempt that at home. No one knows what that means.)

    But he also said ‘Dance me to the end of love 

    Dance me to the children who are asking to be born 

    Dance me through the curtains that our kisses have outworn 

    Raise a tent of shelter now, though every thread is torn 

    Dance me to the end of love’. 

    (That’s cool. You should go ahead and try that.)


    Well, this seems to be going well – Let’s finish it off with an entire poem. I think Cummings deserves the air time and really? Who could say it better?

    i carry your heart with me (i carry it in

    my heart) i am never without it (anywhere

    i go you go, my dear; and whatever is done

    by only me is your doing, my darling)

    i fear

    no fate (for you are my fate, my sweet) i want

    no world (for beautiful you are my world, my true)

    and it’s you are whatever a moon has always meant

    and whatever a sun will always sing is you

    here is the deepest secret nobody knows

    (here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud

    and the sky of the sky of a tree called life; which grows

    higher than soul can hope or mind can hide)

    and this is the wonder that’s keeping the stars apart

    i carry your heart (i carry it in my heart)


    Thank you (walk off awkwardly)

    Post # 6
    153 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: September 2011

    My sister/MOH read The Union:

    Union by Robert Fulghum

    You have known each other from the first glance of acquaintance to this point of commitment. At some point, you decided to marry. From that moment of yes, to this moment of yes, indeed, you have been making commitments in an informal way. All of those conversations that were held in a car, or over a meal, or during long walks – all those conversations that began with, “When we’re married”, and continued with “I will” and “you will” and “we will” – all those late night talks that included “someday” and “somehow” and “maybe” – and all those promises that are unspoken matters of the heart. All these common things, and more, are the real process of a wedding.

    The symbolic vows that you are about to make are a way of saying to one another, “You know all those things that we’ve promised, and hoped, and dreamed – well, I meant it all, every word.”

    Look at one another and remember this moment in time. Before this moment you have been many things to one another – acquaintance, friend, companion, lover, dancing partner, even teacher, for you have learned much from one another these past few years. Shortly you shall say a few words that will take you across a threshold of life, and things between you will never quite be the same.

    For after today you shall say to the world –

    This is my husband. This is my wife.

    Post # 8
    8738 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper
    • Wedding: September 2011

    We had one of Fiance good friends do a reading.

    This is the one we had:

    The Art of a Good Marriage

    Wilferd Arlan Peterson

    Happiness in marriage is not something that just happens.

    A good marriage must be created.

    In marriage the little things are the big things.

    It is never being too old to hold hands.

    It is remembering to say “I love you” at least once a day.

    It is never going to sleep angry.

    It is at no time taking the other for granted; the courtship should not end with the honeymoon, it should continue through the years.

    It is having a mutual sense of values and common objectives.

    It is standing together facing the world.

    It is forming a circle of love that gathers the whole family.

    It is doing things for each other, not in the attitude of duty or sacrifice, but in the spirit of joy.

    It is speaking words of appreciation and demonstrating gratitude in thoughtful ways.

    It is not looking for perfection in each other.

    It is cultivating flexibility, patience, understanding and a sense of humor.

    It is having the capacity to forgive and forget.

    It is giving each other an atmosphere in which each can grow old.

    It is a common search for the good and the beautiful.

    It is establishing a relationship in which the independence is equal, dependence is mutual and the obligation is reciprocal.

    It is not only marrying the right partner, it is being the right partner.


    ETA: We also decided to have a reading because otherwise our whole ceremony would have been about 5 minutes!

    Post # 9
    2701 posts
    Sugar bee

    We didn’t do any readings. I have never appreciated them at other weddings and chose to forgo them for the sake of the guests haha. I think a light-hearted one is fine but they can get too ushy gushy for my personal taste. It is your wedding, so do whatever makes you happy.

    Post # 10
    2142 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: July 2011

    Our non-biblical reading was from C.S. Lewis:
    (and read by my SL/good friend, she can really project which was great)

    Being in love is a good thing, but it is not the best thing. There are many things below it, but there are also things above it. You cannot make it the basis of a whole life. It is a noble feeling, but it is still a feeling. Now no feeling can be relied on to last in its full intensity, or even to last at all. Knowledge can last, principles can last, habits can last but feelings come and go. And in fact, whatever people say, the state called ‘being in love’ usually does not last. If the old fairy-tale ending ‘They lived happily ever after’ is taken to mean ‘They felt for the next fifty years exactly as they felt the day before they were married,’ then it says what probably never was nor ever would be true, and would be highly undesirable if it were. Who could bear to live in that excitement for even five years? What would become of your work, your appetite, your sleep, your friendships? But, of course, ceasing to be ‘in love’ need not mean ceasing to love. Love in this second sense — love as distinct from ‘being in love’ — is not merely a feeling. It is a deep unity, maintained by the will and deliberately strengthened by habit; reinforced by (in Christian marriages) the grace which both partners ask, and receive, from God. They can have this love for each other even at those moments when they do not like each other; as you love yourself even when you do not like yourself. They can retain this love even when each would easily, if they allowed themselves, be ‘in love’ with someone else.‘Being in love’ first moved them to promise fidelity: this quieter love enables them to keep the promise. It is on this love that the engine of marriage is run: being in love was the explosion that started it.

    Post # 11
    1755 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: October 2014

    I’m thinking of this excerpt from one of my favorite books Bridge Across Forever by Richard Bach:

    A soulmate is someone who has locks that fit our keys, and keys to fit our locks. When we feel safe enough to open the locks, our truest selves step out and we can be completely and honestly who we are; we can be loved for who we are and not for who we’re pretending to be. Each unveils the best part of the other. No matter what else goes wrong around us, with that one person we’re safe in our own paradise. Our soulmate is someone who shares our deepest longings, our sense of direction. When we’re two balloons, and together our direction is up, chances are we’ve found the right person. Our soulmate is the one who makes life come to life. 

    Post # 12
    1474 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: September 2011 - Bent Creek Winery (Livermore, California); Reception: Family Residence (San Ramon, California)

    We were pretty simple. We had a scripture reading which our officiant (my dad!) then gave a little homily on. We also had my SIL read a passage from Anne of Avonlea

    “Perhaps, after all, romance did not come into one’s life with pomp and blare, like a gay knight riding down; perhaps it crept to one’s side like an old friend through quiet ways; perhaps it revealed itself in seeming prose, until some sudden shaft of illumination flung athwart its pages betrayed the rhythm and the music; perhaps . . . perhaps . . . love unfolded naturally out of a beautiful friendship, as a golden-hearted rose slipping from its green sheath.” 

    That’s one of my favorite pieces of literature about love, and it beautifully describes my relationship with Darling Husband. It was perfect for us. 

    Post # 13
    1249 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: January 1992

    I would really like to post our readings, but the formatting keeps screwing up.  We are doing:

    – “To Be with one another” by George Eliot

    – “i carry you in my heart” by E. E. Cummings

    – a reading from First Poems, by Maria Rainer Rilke (I think it is on Offbeat Bride…?)

    Post # 15
    2699 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: June 2012


    We’re having this too! I love it!

    Post # 16
    1415 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: November 2011

    Full Catholic mass all the way! Gotta figure out who is going to do them though… someone who won’t get nervous!

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