Post # 1
I’m considering getting a charcoal drawing done of my parent’s deceased dog for them for Christmas. They had to put him down last month after he suffered severe injuries from a tragic accident (I posted about it here, if you’re interested in reading the story).
I think it’s a good idea but I’ve gotten mixed reactions from the family members that I have mentioned it to. Most of my family is with me, thinking that they would really like it but my Aunt seems to think that it’s not a good idea and that it will stir up unwanted emotions on what should be a happy day. If the circumstances of his passing were different (i.e. died of old age or an illness that my parents were prepared for) I wouldn’t hesitate doing this but since it was so sudden and tragic, I’m not sure what the protocol is.
My father still has immense guilt about what happened and they are both obviously still heartbroken over their “sons” passing however, they have decided to get a new puppy in the beginning of the year. It took them a while to make that decision but I really think that they need to share their love with another dog, despite what happened to Bernie.
Since I’m getting mixed reactions from the fam I thought I would take this to the Hive. So, if you were in my parents position having just lost your beloved dog to a tragic accident and someone had a charcoal drawing made of him, how would you feel receiving that for Christmas?
ETA: I plan to have it professionally framed for them as well.
Post # 3
Hmmm, well, my dog, bosco died unexpectedly in 2008. And we’ve adopted two dogs since but my husband always makes sure that he includes Bosco and his memory into special days for me. We do cards from our ‘boys’ to each other on bdays and holidays and he always has one ‘signed’ by Bosco. For our wedding, our cake topper was originally our 2 boys and cat. On our wedding day, once we got to reception site, he took me in there alone for a gift. The person who created our cake topper, also created one of Bosco with a halo and angel wings to put with the other 3.
The reason I tell you this is I cry each and every time he does something like that for me. But it also helps me to continue the memory of my Bosco. It makes me sad but only for a moment. I think that this is such a fresh wound for your parents and yes, they will cry and probably be sad for a moment but I think it’s a great gift. It will help Bernie’s memory and legacy live on for them. I would do it. But that’s my opinion. And what a nice gesture on your part!
Post # 4
I think it’s a great idea. However, I think it may be a bit too soon. I’m not sure if he is a happy memory yet or if he is still a sad tragic accident, ya know?
Post # 5
I think it’s a great idea for next Christmas, but this might be too soon, especially since they haven’t had time to get a new pet and bond with him/her. I would give it time, it doesn’t sound like they’re ready to look at a picture of him and remember the good times yet.
Post # 6
It’s awfully soon. I don’t think I’d want a drawing of my cat if something happened to him for the wall. I have photos. Stuff like this takes time.
Post # 7
Ah I remember that story 🙁 I think it is a REALLY good idea. My parents have something kind of like that for their dog, but he passed of old age. I wonder if maybe it is too fresh a wound yet given the circumstances? I do like the idea though.
Post # 8
I’ll be honest – having lost multiple pets during my 23 years of life, this is not something that I would want, especially this soon following a tragic accident. I have photos and happy memories of all my pets (both past and present) but I wouldn’t want to hang a drawing of one of them on a wall.
Post # 9
I agree with most of the others. If you’re going to do it, it’s definately too soon. I personally wouldn’t give that over Christmas. Maybe wait a few more months.
I think it’s a really nice idea, though. I’d love a gift like that. But not quite so soon, and not on Christmas.
Post # 10
I did this about 6 years ago for my BF’s sister and her husband after their 13 year old puppy had to to be put down. She was old and very arthritic, and it had gotten to where she couldn’t walk very well, and they had her in her box for us to all say goodbye that Thanksgiving. I’d been working on a drwing of her off and on for about a year (I get frustrated and stop projects for a while), but felt bad I hadn’t given it to them before she died, so I doubled up my efforts, and in additon to their normal gifts, framed and wrapped it, telling them as they opened it I was sorry if it upset them, but I’d loved the puppy, too, as her primary dog-sitter. My BF’s sister cried, but they put it up right away, and even after getting their new furbaby a year later, had it up.
Tears aren’t always bad, and it might help them with their greiving to know that they’re not the only ones to miss the dog, and also to have something nice and heartfelt form you to remember her by, other than a tragic accident.
If you’re worried it’s too soon, then that just gives you more time to make sure you’re happy with the drawing, and maybe in 6 months you can give it to them, if you don’t want to wait for next Christmas.
Post # 11
I do like the idea but I’m starting to see where most everyones coming from. I agree, its a little too fresh. If this would have happened six months ago, I probably would have gone through with it but considering they JUST brought his ashes home like last week, it may be too much for them to handle right now. Maybe I’ll do it for a combined mothers/fathers day gift. Thanks for help!
Post # 12
i think it’s a good idea, but right now is too soon. i would wait until next christmas.