Weddingbee boards

I might get a lot of flack for this, but I'm actually not fond of charity registries, personally. I think that they're a good idea in theory, but I actually set aside a certain amount of money that I give away each year to carefully chosen charities, and I really wouldn't want to give to a charity just because someone registered for one. I would much rather put that money toward something I can give the bride and groom, as it's a celebratory occasion. But seriously, that's just me and I'm sure others feel differently.

Charity favors, however, I think are a fantastic idea, because the bride and groom are the ones giving the money on your behalf for something they truly believe in.

I would register for a small gift registry of things you don't need, but would like to have. Believe me, when we first registered, I was like, "We don't need any of that fancy crap" but my mom convinced me to add some nice china on there by saying, "Of course you don't need it, but it's nice to have. What if you ever host a holiday dinner or a dinner party? It'll be nice to have special stuff that can be passed down from family to family." She was right, in my opinion. And know what? out of all the stuff on our registries, the first things to go were the china ... everyone has loved buying it for us.

Just my two cents :)

Honestly, not really, because what if it's something I wouldn't want to donate to? I know that sounds really weird because a charity is a charity, but for me, it's very much along the same lines as telling guests exactly what gift to get you by only registering for four or five vases or something. I dunno, they just tend to not be my thing. I had a coworker who did the Red Cross charity registry, and while it's a very good cause, I wasn't all that thrilled about donating to it because I would have preferred to give my money to a charity that hits closer to home for me. I wasn't invited to the actual wedding, just using it as an example that if I had been, donating to that charity wouldn't have been something I would have been all that excited about.

That's kind of why I prefer that couples, if they want to include a charity of some sort in their wedding, do favors instead. My FI's family member is getting married soon, and she's a cancer survivor and is getting each guest a wristband that coordinates with her cancer ribbon color, and donating $5 per guest to the cause, which is great because she's not telling guests what should be important to them, she's simply saying, "I believe in this cause, and rather than giving you a heart-shaped spoon, we're donating to the charity."

But please, this is just my opinion because you were asking, and you should of course do what you're comfortable with :)

Sure, no problem. I know, it's kind of hard to see it from this perspective because immeditaley, my reaction was also, "Oh, how nice! A charity! Who wouldn't want to give money to a good cause?" but then you think about it, and charities are often a very personal thing for most people.

But yeah, plus, when else can you register for gifts that you normally wouldn't buy yourself anyway? It sounds greedy, but people do like getting the bride and groom gifts :) I know I do.

I don't like charity favors or registries for a number of reasons. I think if someone wants to buy you a gift, they should be able to buy you a gift and donations to charity are their own business. People are so opinionated about charites and which ones are run well and use the money well and which ones are PC. It's sort of like politics and to me NWR.

Registries are supposed to be a courtesy for your guests. To guide them if they would like to give you something. I think it is a nice thing to do in case people ask where you are registered and it will save you from possibly getting some strange/ unwanted items that then cause another etiquette issue.

THe registry doesn't have to be things you need, it can be things you want as well. I mean, who really NEEDS a fondue pot? Yet, a lot of people register for one:-)

I understand the idea behind the charity registry and also behind the idea that you have everything you need already.  The FI and I are in the same boat.  But when I sat down and wrote a list of things that I've had for years that really need to be replaced, such as a bathroom items, I realized that those are things we NEED to replace. And that people enjoy giving those items.  I also choose to list higher-end stuff that I would never buy for myself.  Such as a nice silver serving platter from Macy's.  Normally I'd buy the $20 dollar one from Target that would last me only 10 years.  The other would last a lot longer.  So I've done a few things on a registry at different price levels so people can choose. 

We are also thinking about doing the honeymoon registry.  Yes we can afford to go on our trip but at the same time people enjoy getting you something Wedding related.

My brother got a charity donation for his college from our Step-brother.  The bad part is my SIL didn't go to college there and could care less.  So it was a little onesided.  Plus we give mega bucks each year to the college between us two and our Dad that we wished he would have done something different.  So they can be good and thoughtful ideas but I think it depends on the charity it is given too.