Post # 1
I just need some support and cheering up. I announced my pregnancy to you all about two weeks ago. I miscarried a few days later. I’m completely broken hearted. It was an unexpected pregnancy and I was so surpised and now it’s gone. My FI doesn’t deal with grief well so this has been hard for him to help do much consoling. He lost his mother to cancer when he was young so I understand why this is hard for him.
I don’t mean to pity party but I just need some sort of reassurance that it will be okay. In my heart I know we will be able to move on from this but I just feel lost right now.
Post # 2
First, I’m so so sorry you’re going through this!! Secondly, I don’t know how much of a consolation this will be, but the baby you do end up having with your FI will be even more appreciated and special because then it’s your “miracle” baby. 🙂 then you can celebrate even more when you have that baby. Miscarriage is hard. 🙁 but things WILL be better!
Post # 3
I hate saying, “it was meant to be”, but maybe someone else has better plans in store for you? I can only imagine how you’re feeling right now, but I know some day (probably sooner than you think) things will turn around. Maybe you and your husband should throw a pity party together? Do something fun together to say, “Yeah, this sucks, but we still have each other”?
Anywho, I don’t know if I helped at all, but regardless: condolences to you and all my prayers for a better future!
Post # 4
I’m so sorry that happened, ***hugs***
It WILL be ok, I promise. Give yourself time to heal and grieve. Remind yourself that it’s ok to feel sad, to cry, to yell, etc. A miscarriage is a traumatic event; don’t be hard on yourself/blame yourself.
If you find that your husband is having a REALLY hard time, you may consider a few sessions with a therapist to help him.
And many women have experienced miscarriages, and many of them get pregnant again and have healthy pregnancies/healthy babies. 🙂
Post # 5
Peaceoutboyscout: I am so sorry for your loss.
but I can assure you that time does help to heal. So take all the time you want and find comfort and support in each other.
You may not fully get over it- I know I haven’t, but the initial heart breaking sting slowly starts to fade
hang in there – tomorrow will be easier than today
Post # 6
Peaceoutboyscout: Ooh I’m so sorry to see this. Hugs! Let the grief out otherwise it will inbed itself inside. Everything will be OK and on a positive you caught.
Post # 7
Thank you everyone. Even just since last night I feel just a little bit better. I know time heals all. I just feel guilty that my body was not able to take care of that little person. I also feel guilty because I know I should feel blessed to already have a daughter but I can’t help but look at my daughter and know she was supposed to have a little sibling.
Today is a new day and I’ll work through it. Life must go on. I am really craving some normalcy.
Post # 8
I meant to tag all you ladies to thank you for your kind words. Oops.
alpinebride: chevaldame: LadyMoriarty: mrscandyv: CatyLady:
Post # 9
Anyone else got some funny pictures or encouraging words? I feel so lame but wedding bee is all I have right now!
Post # 10
I’m so sorry for your loss. I am currently miscarrying as well. I had a D&C last Wednesday and just waiting to get back to normal. I have a daughter too, and I will make her a sibling eventually! Pm me if you want to.
Post # 11
I am so sorry this happened. I completely understand it because I went through it with an unexpected pregnancy as well. There needs to be a grieving time but it does get much better. For me, I became excited at the thought of having a ababy with my FI because we do plan to have children and so it was a loss but then after that there was this peaceful feeling of “OK, now we can plan better and we can move forward”. Do see a therapist if you need to talk it out. I can promise you, it will get better!!! Focus on the things in life you enjoy, take care of yourself and take it a day at a time.
Post # 12
I’m so sorry for your loss. Miscarriage is a really difficult, heartbreaking experience. Your grief might be more intense than you expect or last for longer than you’d think, but trust me – it really does get better.
It’s okay to have a pity party for a while, though. It’s a really shitty thing to go through and a lot of people who haven’t experienced might not understand exactly how shitty it is. And I think it’s always better to let yourself grieve and feel the loss rather than bottle it up inside.
What helps me is remembering how incredibly common miscarriage is – that so many women go through it, but they all do get through it. You find a strength that you didn’t know you had. And eventually you will begin to heal – probably sooner than you think.
Hang in there. I’m sending you lots of internet hugs.
Post # 13
heathaah: 🙁 I’m so sorry. This is honestly one of the hardest things I’ve ever been Through. You seem to have a good positive outlook that things will get better. How do you look past all the negativity?
At this point I think I just need to go see a therapist. This miscarriage is really putting a strain on mine and FI’s relationship. He is pushing me away and is pretending like nothing is wrong. He went out drinking instead of being with me when he knew I was having an especially hard night. He told me to eat some ice cream.
I know everyone handles grief differently. I just want to feel normal again.
Post # 14
Songstress_7: how long did it take for you to come to the realization that you would move on? I feel like I should be over it. No one around me really seems to be affected by this. Am I being too sensitive?
Post # 15
Peaceoutboyscout: “I feel like I should be over it.”
Sorry to thread-jack, but I just wanted to chime in…
I suffered a MC back in October, but I’m in no way over the grief… I don’t think I ever will be. That being said, some days are harder than others; some days I don’t think about it at all. Also, like you, everyone around me just kind of brushed it aside like something was wrong, so it was meant to happen. My husband was in complete denial about the pregnancy to begin with, too, so losing the baby didn’t phase him at all… and that’s made everything harder to deal with. <br />You’re not too sensitive at all, my darling… no one knows what it’s like until they’re in the situation. I find healing in opening up about my experience. But, as I was saying, it never goes away. It’s something that will always be with you now, a place in your heart that can’t be filled by anything or anyone else.<br /><br />*hugs*.