Post # 1
I am not pregnant, but we are considering trying again soon. So here is my story and follow-up question…(Pregnant ladies, don’t let this story make you nervous…this is extremely rare! 1 in 600 births is a high estimate according to my physical therapist!)
My little girl was born April 2012. Though she was only 6lbs 9 oz, I did some pretty major damage to my body during delivery. I separated my pelvis. It was unpredictable. It was discovered when I was helped up to go to the bathroom and just collapsed. They sent me for xrays that day and it wasn’t pretty. I could not even stand for 2 days. I was confined to my hospital bed and I did not want many visitors because the pain was so bad. I was obviously pretty drugged too.
I was allowed to go home once my hospital bed and wheelchair were delivered. I had to sleep in the living room as making it upstairs was not an option. I had physical therapy in my house 3 times a week. I needed help with everything, even getting in and out of bed. I also had to wear this binder to help force my pelvis back together. The worst part was that when my baby was crying in her basinet, I could not go get her. I had to wait for someone to bring her to me. My husband took 3 weeks off work to care for both me and the baby. Poor guy was just exhausted.
In the end, I was in my wheelchair for over a month. I had to learn to walk again, first with a walker, then with a cane. I look back at my facebook statuses celebrating my successes, and see things like “took 7 steps today!” and remember just how bad it was. I just finished ourpatient physical therapy this past June, and still have severe SI joint pain as a result. My hips hurt often too.
I know I will likely end up on bedrest toward the end of my next pregnancy, which is fine. It will suck, but I will survive. But the question is will I have a c section next time? My doctor said she would absolutely recommend it, and said this is very likely to happen again. She also suggested next time would be even worse as 2nd babies tend to be bigger and come out faster. She then told me she had another patient that this happened to. This woman went on to have 3 more vagnal births, ending up in the wheelchair again each time.
I am petrified of a c section. Scared shitless of laying there awake knowing my guts are all open. I really would love to have a vaginal birth. I can’t really put my finger on my reason why besides fear. I guess I think that, since I have been through one before, I would feel more in control. My husband is really pushing for the c section because taking care of both me and the baby was no easy task. I know it is my body, so my decision, but is it selfish for me to want that seeing all it put him through too?
What would you do?? Thanks!!!
Post # 3
Wow, so sorry you went through such a hard recovery after your first baby! I must say, I’m super pro-natural when it comes to birth, I hope to avoid a C-section (and, really, any unnecessary interventions) at all possible costs when I have a baby, but in your case, I would go with a planned C-section. It’s scary, but I would think the pain and recovery from a C-section would in no way even come close to what you went through (and would likely go through again) from a natural birth.
Post # 4
I remember your birthstory & oh my gosh everything you went through! I can only imagine how difficult it must be to think about going through again. Personally, I think it would take alot of analyzing the last birth experience…
Was it unmedicated or medicated?
How much upright movement was there in labor? Was baby malpresentationed at all?
What position was delivery in?
All the answers to those questions can make alot of difference in how a birth goes.
Could seeing a chiropractor through pregnancy be something that you could do? That can help keep you aligned AND help baby be in the best presentation possible… that could make a huge difference too!
For me, if my answers were: medicated, not much, yes (if she was posterior), & lithotomy position, then I would try to learn natural birth techniques to be able to go unmedicated & do what I could to promote an “easier” (terrible chioce of wording but can’t think of anything else atm) & I would most definitely deliver in a DIFFERENT position (on my side, or even all 4’s would probably be better). That’s what I would likely do. AND I would see a chiropractor through my pregnancy (something I’m doing this time anyways).
Ultimately you really just have to choose what you’re most comfortable with… 😉
Post # 5
Thanks for the opinions. I am just so scared of the surgery and complete lack of control that goes along with it. But on the other hand, I still have days now where I can’t walk very well. Actually I was in the ER for pain just last week. Maybe I am nuts for even considering another pregnancy.
But then at times I am like “eh, a few months in bed…no big deal! I can re-learn walking one more time!” Sounds nuts but man, C-sections scare me!
@runsyellowlites: She was totally in perfect position. There were no issues during the birth at all, which is why it was so surprising after. I walked around during the early parts of labor. Normal labor though I needed pitocin, 22 hours but comfortable for most of it, epidural at about 4 cm (I think), 1.5 hours of pushing. Epi was wearing off a bit so I felt pretty painful contractions but no “ring of fire.” Honestly not sure if I could go unmedicated, especially since my injuries might cause me even more pain than a normal delivery. But you are 100% right on about the position I pushed in! I would for sure be in a different position next time. I was on my back with my legs sometimes held by Darling Husband and the nurse, and sometimes held under the knees and pulled back myself. I should talk to my OB (and my orthopedic dr too) about birthing positions. Good point! Thanks!
Can anyone out there reassure me that c-sections arent that bad? Has anyone ever had the same injury I had?
Post # 6
@heathaah: The lithotomy position closes the pelvis up to 30% so that alone could’ve caused the problem. Also seeing a chiropractor in pregnancy could help ensure that your pelvis is aligned when labor starts (it could’ve already be a bit off…. I had alignment issues in my last pregnancy)
Really though, cesarean aren’t “bad”… they’re a wonderful technology that when used appropriately are successful at giving moms & babies safe births!
It’s just a matter of being informed & choosing what risks you’re more comfortable with.
Post # 7
Wow what a story… I am happy to hear that things have turned out well in the end.
Honest opinion ???
I probably would stop at one child if I were in your shoes… I am not one who likes Hopitals, pain, etc. So I couldn’t do it again the whole vaginal delivery bit… (or the risk of having one, in any way, shape, or form)
But I am not, so I respect the fact that you have posted this topic to ask the Question that is weighing on your mind
In truth, I’ve had a C-Section… it wasn’t my ideal choice for delivery
BUT it was the option that was presented at the time that WAS BEST for BOTH myself and the baby
And THAT IS WHAT MATTERS… the health and welfare of the people involved.
Mom & Baby
If you truly want another Baby, a C-Section is the way I’d go
And I can assure you that it really isn’t that bad at all… certainly NOTHING COMPARED TO WHAT YOU’VE ALREADY BEEN THRU (that sounds like it was a living Nightmare / H3LL)
On a scale of 1 to 10, with what you’ve been thru a 10+… then a C-Section is maybe a 4 or 5… normal delivery maybe a 2 or 3 (depending on how long labour, and no other complications).
Hope this helps,
PS… I VOTED – C-SECTION
BUT as I said, IF you had had the option NOT HAVING A BABY, that would have been my first choice.
Post # 8
Do you have any specific concerns about the c-section? Because of it’s just feeling a lack of control over the situation, I can’t imagine that having pubis symphysis and being bedridden for several weeks makes you feel any less in control! I had a planned c-section for medical reasons (well it was supposed to be scheduled but then my water broke 10 days early so it became an urgent section)and all subsequent deliveries will be repeat sections. Ideally I would have preferred a vaginal birth, but the c-section doesn’t sound half as bad as what you already went through.
Post # 9
Yea, I guess my main concern is the lack of control. Related to that is a fear that my anxiousness about the situation will cause me to panic during it. I don’t generally have anxiety or panic attacks, etc., but I am super afraid that being awake and thinking about the fact that I am cut wide open will just cause me to freak out. It sounds silly and I feel silly typing it, but I don’t know. Maybe I need to just learn more about the surgery. But that could make it worse!
Sometimes on my bad pain days I do question having another child. But my first baby is so worth everything I went through and continue to go through. My second baby will be too!
Post # 10
@heathaah: I had C-sections (the first two unplanned). Yes I was out of control as you put it, but you’re cut open and out of control any time you go under the knife, e.g. having your appendix out.
I was in pain, but it went away over the first few days, and then I was tender for some time after that. But at least I could walk around and do things. It certainly sounds nothing like what you went through.
Post # 11
I understand you’re worried about not being in control during a C-section, but honestly, being bedridden for weeks and depending on your husband for your care and that of your children sounds like a much greater loss of control. You will have two babies to take care of this time; everything is going to be more difficult.
With a typical C-section you’re encouraged to start walking on the same day. You will need some pain relief but not heavy sedation, so you will be conscious throughout the entire recovery period. You’ll be out of the hospital in 3 days with instructions on how to take care of your wound, and you will be taking care of it yourself. You won’t need to meet with healthcare professionals for months. You will be able to meet most of your children’s needs without help. You will be back to normal in no time.
It’s major surgery and shouldn’t be taken lightly, but it’s also extremely common (too common) and is usually free of complications. Try to learn more about it and address whatever fears you may have. I don’t think you should risk going through what you went through again.
Post # 12
I think @paula1248: brings up a great point that you are “out of control” whenever you go under the knife. I’m going to take that a bit further. I would argue that you were not in control when your pelvis was dislocated in your first pregnancy. You were certainly not in control during the first part of the recovery period when you could not get up to get your baby out of the bassinett. That is also lack of control right there!
Did your doctor explain in detail why s/he is suggesting a c-section? It seems as if s/he implied that the next pregnancy can make the condition you’re still suffering from a whole lot worse and that the recovery will be worse. Is there any chance that the pregnancy with c-section would make it worse anyway or is the c-section going to be the better option in all cases?
If your doctor says the c-section would be the best option in all cases, I would go with that. It seems like not only could the injuries of the second pregnancy be worse, but also that you might not recover as well a second time–if this is the case then I would definitely do the c-section.
Post # 13
Damn, girl. A c-section is NOTHING compared to what you went through! I’ve had one, trust that it is not that bad. You focus more on “Oh my gosh, I get to meet my baby soon! Hurry up and cut me open so I can see my cherub! Stitch me back together so I can hold him/her!” Seriously, that’s where MY mind was at. I was a little freaked about imagining the surgery, but you can’t see it and the anesthesiologist is right there with a medication to bring down your nausea.
I would much rather be tender in the belly than completely dependent on others to take care of my own baby, *that* is true loss of control to me.
Post # 14
@heathaah: oh my lord. I would have a c section without a doubt. What’s worse- suffering through that again or the fears of a very common surgery. I would talk through the entire surgery including risks w your doctor. Maybe there is some way to make you more comfortable?
Post # 15
I’ve never seen a post yet where I voted c-section until this one. I can’t imagine how hard it would be on you to have a toddler AND a newborn that you can’t care for, as well as being bedridden and in pain. I think a c-section is a way better idea, but I wish you the best of luck and health either way.
Post # 16
I’m not normally one to suggest c-section but in this case I say it’s the best option by far. It’s a much better option than risking further more permantent and long term damage. I have a few friends who have had c-sections and they have all been happy with the recovery.