Choice…Which would you choose and why?

posted 3 years ago in Proposals
  • poll: Which would you prefer?
    Vacation/Interesting Location (non-surprise)- explain : (50 votes)
    38 %
    Surprise (explain) : (82 votes)
    62 %
  • Post # 3
    48 posts
    • Wedding: August 2014

    I wouldn’t of wanted to know it was coming, he actually proposed on a vacation but i figured that was too predictable and he wouldn’t! I loved that it was a surprise!

    Post # 4
    8518 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper
    • Wedding: April 2014

    Well I’ve never been on a vacation, so I’ll take that!

    Post # 5
    6958 posts
    Busy Beekeeper
    • Wedding: October 2015

    @nerdybee:  I would prefer to not know because I would feel weird knowing. Proposals are the only question that you sometimes know ahead of time and it seems awkward to me. It’s like in middle school when your crush’s best friend’s sister tells you he’s going to ask you out after school. Just weird. 

    Post # 6
    8680 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper
    • Wedding: October 2014


    Post # 7
    10219 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: December 2012

    I don’t like HUGE surprises, or public displays…

    (a Flash Mob, Jumbo Tron etc, wouldn’t be my style at all)

    So for me, given your choice… I’d rather know that it was happening on an upcoming vacation.

    That said, both times I’ve been engaged / married, I knew it was coming. As we had talked about marriage a lot beforehand.

    With my Ex it was the last year of Uni, he bought me a Promise Ring, and we made plans for my real ring at the end of our first summer after Graduation once we had got settled into our first jobs…  In the end it was how it went down… a late August trip to a Jewellery Store to pick out the Ring.  No big proposal.

    With Mr TTR we exchanged our UPDATED LIFE PLANS at 6 years of Dating.  And I told him I wanted to be married within the year… by the end of 2012.

    He told me he’d do it on his terms, and in his own way.  As I understand how important Proposals are to men, that was ok with me.  The only thing I asked was that he NOT SURPRISE me with a ring… that we would choose one together when the time was right.

    So essentially, I didn’t know if we’d be going ring shopping or there would be a Proposal without a ring.

    I was a Waiting Bee, so I get that uneasiness… but at the same time, I am a confident woman, and just got on with my life… and tried to put the whole thing aside (and I certainly didn’t mention it).  I lived each day as any other and savoured what we had in the moment.

    In the end, he proposed to me sans ring, on our Easter Vacation in Myrtle Beach.  It was a HUGE surprise in that he caught me off guard.

    BUT he totally respected my wishes and it wasn’t over the top… he didn’t even get down on bended knee… he just told me we should get married the next time we were in town, and he was serious.  He even had some of the details worked out.  It was awesome.  I wouldn’t have wanted it any other way.

    Hope this helps,


    Post # 8
    1400 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: June 2014

    @nerdybee:  Haha I voted for expected on vacation because that’s what I got and it was perfect! 🙂

    I accidentally found out about it a week before (his phone kept going off and we were in the middle of trying to buy a house so I thought it might be important; it was a recently married friend friend texting back about getting together to talk because now-FI had an important question he was about to ask me), and it made it so much easier for FI, who has anxiety and was really stressing out about trying to surprise me with the proposal. This way we were able to just soak in every minute of a wonderful day (and night, he got us an amazing hotel room for the night and they upgraded us to a suite for free) that was incredibly romantic and the details were still all surprises to me 🙂 And that weekend we were able to celebrate with my family, who lives 400 miles away from us! I wouldn’t change a thing. 

    Post # 9
    11379 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: April 2012

    i’m not one for surprises and i love vacations.  that was an easy choice for me.

    Post # 10
    571 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: June 2013

    I was surprised on a vacation lol! I had no idea he was even thinking about it. Everyone kept asking “how could you not know?!?” but I honestly had no clue.

    I like surprises 😀

    Post # 11
    9206 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: May 2018

    I picked vacation, mainly because FI proposed to me while we were on vacation (just on holiday at the Sunshine Coast for three days but still, vacation) and I had a feeling/was hoping it would happen there because we were celebrating our 3rd anniversary (we go on holiday every year to celebrate) and I had a feeling it would happen on our anniversary, which it did. I think even knowing it was coming (right down to the minutes, I saw the ring box bulge in his pocket) did not make it any more special. So I think vacation at an amazing location, while knowing it’s coming, would still be pretty damn special!!!

    Post # 12
    351 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: October 2013

    This is all I have to say: If it’s proposal time, and you’re going on a romantic vacation, propose! Before we were engaged, my husband told me he intended to propose soon. Then he  took me on a romantic vacation to Curacao.

    On our way there, a lady on the plane said to me, “I bet he will propose on this this trip.” Weird, right? Later, he said that wasn’t going to happen. It seems stupid now, but I cried over that, and it ruined our vacation for me. I was so ready!!!

    Post # 13
    2125 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: June 2015

    @nerdybee:  interesting that you bring this up now.  My boyfriend told me that he wants to propose to me on a vacation and wants me to be part of the process. It won’t be a surprise this way, but I rather it would be. 

    ETA: I forgot to say why. I already know he has my ring and I was with him when he bought it. That’s how we both wanted it to be, but I still want a little surprise in the mix. Just like I was surprised back when he asked me to be his girlfriend in high school, I want to be surprised when he asks me to be his wife. It seems like it would be more special that way. I also wouldn’t be freaking out the whole vacation.

    Post # 14
    730 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: August 2014 - South Bonson Pier & Community Centre

    my FH popped it while we were on vacation for our fifth anniversary, and even though I suspected, it was still a surprise. Not knowing details is close enough to it being a surprise, I think. 

    Post # 15
    1102 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: August 2014

    @nerdybee:  i got for the shock and surprise for sure … just b.c. not knowing is more magical and it would be a story not jsut … ohh i knew we went on holiday i picked my ring my self 

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