(Closed) Choosing Bridesmaids and a MOH?

posted 8 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 3
Member
361 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: December 1969

Bella,

I had the same problem.  3 out of 4 of mine are my closest friends.  Other friends told me to choose by how long I had been friends with them – I met them at the same time in college.  One said to choose by height – they are all the same height.  Hahahaha.  Another said to choose by who would have me as their MOH – that somewhat narrowed it down.  But there were still two that were battling it out in my head, pretty much. 

I had narrowed it down to the girls who felt like sisters to me – a little more than the other one in the top 3.  It’s a hard decision, and it shouldn’t be taken lightly, but don’t panic over it.  Now that I’m getting closer to my date, I am realizing that two of the other girls are really stepping up more than my MOH. 

So, my ending advice would be to narrow it down to those you feel are more like sisters to you, and then pick the one who has the most sense of responsibility and will be (and maybe already has been) a calm, encouraging person to you in the past.  This day coming up will be very trying for you.  Your MOH needs to be your support system who knows you almost as well as you know yourself. 

Post # 4
Member
4765 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: January 2011 - Vintage Villas

You don’t necessarily HAVE to have a MOH. If you feel like you are equally close to all of your friends, then there’s no reason to honor one of them above the rest! If you think about it and can’t come up with someone that you think you would rather have as your MOH above the others, then I would just have them all be BMs. 

Post # 5
Member
4385 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

hmmm. this is tricky. it was easy for me because i am super close with my sister. my advice is, if you really feel your relationship is the same level with all of these girls. pick the one you think will be the most helpful, the one who you can rely on, and the one who will be calm and soothing on your wedding day! hope this helps!

Post # 7
Member
2641 posts
Sugar bee

I was going to say what amanda.lynn said.  Why bother with a MOH if they are equal to you?  And really why is your mom putting a deadline of this month when it is a year before your wedding?  You can ask them to be BMs, get the dresses all set etc.  And if you find one of them really steps up to help and plan, you can decide to make her a MOH later, right?  I think the others will understand if you make “Sally” MOH because she’s clearly been busting her butt to help you.

But if that doesn’t happen, just divvy up the MOH honors for the wedding day, without making anyone a MOH.  Have one person stand next to you for the ceremony.  Have someone else sign the marriage certificate.  Have someone else being announced jsut before you at the reception, or sitting next to you at dinenr.  And so on.

Good luck.

Post # 8
Member
361 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: December 1969

This is definitely a little more tricky than I had expected.  I think you’re mom is probably on the right track – you gotta just do it.  Like a band-aid.  My 4 bridesmaids live in 4 different states – none of which are Florida.  And the two I mentioned previously have stepped up in ways that my mother hasn’t been able to – and she lives 5 minutes away.  So, don’t let the “not in the same state” thing be a factor.  The internet is your friend.  hahahahah. 

Post # 10
Member
366 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

You could also just explain to them the situation, tell them you love them all equally, and do something goofy like have them do rock paper scissors for MOH title.  I also really like the idea of just not having a MOH.  I hope it all worked out!

Post # 12
Member
7976 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

J’s best friend is going to be his Best Man, and that guy’s wife is going to be one of my BMs, so I’m just going to make her MOH. Works out nicely, since she’s also my only local BM πŸ™‚

Post # 13
Member
323 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

I’ve decided on my sister. Although I’ve had close female friends at different stages of my life, it’s harder to keep in touch as 4 of them live about 50+ miles away, and one who is local I struggle to keep in touch with as she’s always so busy (It’s always me who does the legwork for that too).

I know my sister will be honest and keep a cool head when I feel out of control of everything. I know I can rely on her. The bf would choose his schoolfriend he’s known since he was 4. He barely keeps in touch with him, but they’re both as bad as eachother. I’m a bit sad that I’ve never met him yet.

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