Choosing whether to respond or not to a vendor's email?

posted 3 years ago in Etiquette
  • poll: How do I respond?
    Don't email him back. If you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all. : (21 votes)
    34 %
    Email him back (but lie about why you won't be using their services) : (25 votes)
    41 %
    Email him back and delicately explain that you were unhappy with the response. : (15 votes)
    25 %
  • Post # 3
    11379 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: April 2012

    @lemiller:  if you know that you definitely are not going to be using this venue, simply email back, “thank you for your time but we will not be needing the services of your venue.”


    Post # 4
    85 posts
    Worker bee

    UGH!! My biggest pet peeve relates to all things email etiquette-related! I hate it when people: don’t respond to your emails, give vague answers, or think that it’s ok not to bother with answering all of your questions. Communicating with vendors brings the frustration up to another level!  I sooo feel your pain. 

    There’s no excuse for a business to have responded to you the way that this vendor has. I’d definitely send a response to the vendor because I always try to respond to all emails as well. You don’t really need to give them a reason, so I’ll leave it up to you if you want to elaborate on WHY you won’t be going with them. If you do choose to express your frustrations with your interactions with the vendor, I’d try to do it in a “constructive criticism”-oriented manner. 

    Post # 5
    11668 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: November 1999

    I don’t thikn you HAVE to respond, but it would be polite to just let him know thanks but no thanks.

    In this type of situation, where you have tons of questions, I think a phone call is really better than an e-mail.  There’s so much variation in pricing, etc. when it comes to venues and weddings, it would be much easier (and quicker) to talk about it on the phone rather than answer an e-mail with 10 questions.

    Post # 6
    3119 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: August 2012

    @mypinkshoes: +1

    Yes, I think just leave it at a polite response…no need to get into details unless you think it would be taken constructively and are feeling generous. But just state that you appreciate his responses, but are no longer interested.

    Good for you for wanting to respond as a courtesy, it’s often much easier not to. 


    Post # 7
    2460 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: November 2013

    I responded to every vendor that emailed me, even if we didn’t go with them. I figure they took the time to respond to my inquiry so the least I can do is thank them and let them know we went with someone else. 


    Post # 8
    9204 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: May 2018

    Respond saying you won’t be using the venue

    Post # 9
    6158 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: October 2013

    i wouldn’t respond and move on. i’m sure he is not going to follow up.

    terrible that a professional does not take the time to review his work.


    Post # 10
    2222 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: October 2011

    I think after the first or second unsatisfactory email. I would have picked up the phone and talked to someone live. 

    Obviously this guy has bad email etiquette but many vendors don’t like to put hard $ in emails. And weddings really can have huge price ranges.

    If you have specific questions, I tend to find talking to someone gets better answers and you can ask follow up questions on the spot.

    Post # 11
    2657 posts
    Sugar bee

    I feel your pain – I had a similar conversation with a potential photographer yesterday.   You really do not need to respond to their message, however it is at least nice to tell them that you are not going to use them.  Speaking as someone who works closely with a sales team, I do appreciate it when customers say they are looking into other options.  Keep it simple, just say “Thank you for your time, but we are pursuing a different venue”.  They will likely not come back with any response, but if they do just keep saying that their venue wasn’t a good fit for you.  

    Post # 12
    502 posts
    Busy bee

    I would definitely respond, just maybe without a ton of detail. His email contained a question so to not respond is just blatantly ignoring him. Despite his shortcomings, he still took the time to respond to you and answer your questions (sort of).

    Post # 13
    941 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: April 2015

    If you don’t respond, he may keep sending you follow-up emails. If you are positive you don’t want to look at the venue further, I’d respond with a simple, “thank you but we’ve decided to go with a different venue” If he responds with additional questions, I would say no need to respond to those additional emails. You’ve given him your answer. 

    Post # 14
    3199 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: October 2013

    @mypinkshoes:  +1. almost exactly what i was going to type.

    i had a venue i contacted act like that, like they crapped roses and rainbows and puppy dogs. i don’t get people like that. what a weirdo.

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