Weddingbee boards

We are having a heavy hors douvres reception in Sept and I'm wondering who in the beehive has actually had one or been to one??  I need advice-  dismiss tables?  How many pieces per person?  How long should the food stay out?  When to start dancing?  I love the cocktail party atmosphere but with 200+ people, we can't have chaos. 

I was thinking 12-15.  We have included a mashed potato bar that my future hubby is totally excited about!  Our caterer doesn't have much experience with weddings this style- this is a very new trend in NW Indiana.  It's just so our style we had to do it!!  I hate being stuck at a table staring at the same people for an hour +!!!  Thanks RB!

We are doing lots of really heavy hors doeuvres- more to eat than an actual sit down dinner.  That's what I don't get- our guests will have more food- but I still have to mention that it's hors d'oeuvres?  It's still dinner, just a different presentation.  Ugh.  This is harder than I thought.  I like the wording "cocktail style reception".  Instead of "cocktail reception".  We will have seating for all of our guests since there will be a few "seated" moments- toasts etc.......Sometimes I just want to give up and do a sit down- it would even cost less!  BUT- I have had my heart set on this style forever!

We are having the same type of reception and I have the same questions that you do! I have debated mentioning the hors d'oeurves on the invitation, and I can't decide what to do. Our ceremony is at 6 and our reception starts at 7:30, so it is at dinner time, but we will have more than enough food for everyone. It will start late enough that, if people want to eat something beforehand, they will have time, so I kind of wanted to give them a heads up, but on the other hand I don't want to bother with it because really they aren't going to go hungry. I think in the end I will end up mentioning it on the invite. Worst case scenario, some people will eat beforehand and won't be as hungry at the reception, so there will be more for everyone else who didn't eat?

As for how much of each item, your caterer should be able to help with that. At the beginning we are having 3 items that will be passed, and we're providing approximately 1/guest of each of those. Then when we have the rest of the food and the stations come out, we've allowed for 1 or 2 servings per guest for each of those, per our caterer's recommendations. We figure that not everyone is going to eat one of everything, so providing enough for everyone to have at least one serving (sometimes two servings) will balance everything out in the end. Some people won't eat any of one item but might want two of another item, for example.

Here's a general question about the invitation wording...does cocktail reception imply open bar also? We're not having a completely open bar, but we are providing most, hopefully all, of the drinks for our guests. We're setting a bar tab, and we've set it high enough that it *should* cover all the drinks, but it may not. In that case, we're playing it by ear and may up the tab, depending on how the reception is going. There is the possibility though that the tab will run out, at which point the bar will go to cash bar (our website clearly states all of this info so our guests should be prepared). I know that open bar vs. cash bar is always a controversial topic, but we're not inviting a ton of big drinkers so we chose this as a way to both save money and to ensure that no one gets completely wasted. Back to the point...would it be misleading to say that our reception is cocktail style if there's the possibility (which, at this point, I'd say is 50/50 just because I have nothing to go on) that not all the drinks will be provided?

Thanks again ladies!  I love your ideas!  Whitehydrangea- we are going to have exactly the same bar situation- host tab.  And then, when cake (cupcakes) are served, we'll have a fruit display and an espresso bar!!  I like the wording- Hors doeuvres dinner on the invite- that way it doesn't imply an alcohol free for all!  (even though it will be that way for a while)  Our reception site is at least a 1/2 hour from anyones hotel or home and we don't want guests drinking too much and then driving home.  Plus- FI and our families don't drink and I couldn't justify paying $18 pp for drinks!  yikes!  This is great to get to hash out details like this!