cold feet about buying a home

posted 3 years ago in Home
Post # 3
1992 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: March 2014

@amandasouthcarolina:  We just bought a home and it has been an emotional rollercoaster. It was a foreclosure and while I love the space (3 acres) and the location (total peace and quiet, on a bluff overlooking a lake), I hate the maintenance (septic backed up into the SHOWER yesterday, washing machine broke) and the drive to my job because its so far out.

There are good days and bad days. I never regret buying A house, but sometimes I wish we had bought an EASIER house rather than a 3500 SF foreclosure that had been vacant for two years and was a massive fixer upper. I’d just say choose carefully.

Post # 4
4638 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

I think it’s normal. Anytime there’s a great deal of money on the line, it’s scary!

If you’re concerned about things like resale value, sinking money into it, or moving.. Just make sure you do your research. It helps alot to be an informed buyer when it comes to such a large purchase. Makes it seem a lot less scary when you know the market and what to expect.

Post # 5
1670 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

It’s a gamble at any rate. I bought in 2011 thinking we would stay in Manhattan for years, and now of course FI and I think we will be moving in 2015. Oh well! We can rent it if we want, but the whole thing stresses me out. FI keeps reminding me that it has been a great investment, but it makes me so nervous!

Post # 6
3077 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: February 2015

@amandasouthcarolina:  I’m not even looking at buying yet but I TOTALLY understand your feelings. We’ll be looking to buy within the next 5 years likely and are just trying to save up now but when I think about settling down into ONE place, it totally freaks me out lol

Post # 7
8387 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: April 2013

I think doing a lot of research helps (i.e. pulling comparatives, market values over the past 10-20 years, etc).  The way I see it, if I rent, I am definitely losing money, whereas, if I buy I have a chance of making my money back.  However, my husband and I are a bit older (in our 30s) and we’re happy with our location/his career.

Post # 8
3948 posts
Honey bee

@amandasouthcarolina:  Thats normal. Its most likely the biggest purchase you will ever make in your life, so you should be thinking about everything.

My advice is to only buy when you are ready to settle down for several years. We bought our home knowing we wont consider selling for 7-10 years.

Also, get a good/trusted home inspection. There will be a LOT of things you can’t see just walking through the home. A good home inspector will point out every single detail/issue so you know exactly what you are getting into. Walk with him/her, take notes, and ask questions. Our home inspection took several hours but it was invaluable.


Post # 9
7281 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2011 - Bed & Breakfast

I think your concerns are pretty normal. My best advice is to be cautious and rational when making such a big decision. We purchased because we knew this was the area where we would live, period. Even if one of us changed jobs, it would have to be within this general area, because this is where our family lives and this is where we choose to raise our own family. We also purchased our forever home and made sure to buy in a very stable, desirable, well-off area to ensure good re-sale when the time comes. But we don’t have to focus on that aspect too much because this is a 40 year home for us. And ALL houses are money pits. The degree of money pit status will vary from house to house, but all houses will eventually eat up a significant amount of money for maintenance, repairs, and cosmetic updating. Even if you buy a brand new house, it will still need all new appliances every 10 years, a new roof every 15-20 years, intermittent pipe repairs, landscaping every year, etc.

Post # 10
4878 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: November 2010

Around here, it’s typical for the buyer to get seller to pay for a 1 yr home warranty.  A little piece of mind during that tough first year.


Be sure to shop around for one with good coverage.

Post # 11
420 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

All I want to say is location, location, location. Do your research about the area before you buy. If I were you, I would make sure that I can rent it out easily in case I have to move somewhere else. And make sure that 1 person income can afford the mortgage in case one of you lose your job. Other than that, happy house hunting!

Post # 12
10384 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2010

If resale value isn’t good, and you can’t take the hit, you will rent it out.

Don’t buy in an area where the rug can easily be pulled out. It’s unlikely that a housing bubble will burst within a few year’s time frame, so I think that you are ok there. Just take your time and make sure that it’s a great location, a floor plan you can grow into, and that the home’s condition isn’t something that will cost a lot to fix.

Post # 13
737 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

I felt the same way before I closed on my house!  But once that went thru I was like okay lets party! 

Post # 14
820 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

@amandasouthcarolina:  I was scared when we started looking at houses. It is a VERY big purchase. This house is our lifetime house so it was very important to us we got a house we absolutely loved and didn’t want to settle on certain things. I think we got an amazing price. At first  we didn’t know how we would know it was “The One”, but once we saw this last house we we both just instantly knew this was it.

Make sure you ask lots of questions when you look at houses. We had an awesome realtor and that really helped. She has been in the business for over 20 years and knew what questions to ask and everything. It was a very emotional and stressful Process though. It took us about 3 months before we actually found our dream house From when we started looking. It was the 12th house we looked at. It took 1 1/2 months to close on it from when we first saw it. We saw a few houses that were definitely money pits. One house had no kitchen, no flooring in the living room, and there was mushrooms growing through the floor! It was disgusting!

We finally get keys this Sunday and I can’t wait to get a few things done and finally move in. I’m a bit nervous, but VERY excited.

Post # 15
2070 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: November 2012 - Oak Tree Manor

@amandasouthcarolina:  It’s okay, I felt that way too!! I was terrified of spending our life savings on a house. When we put down an offer, I felt sick to my stomach for the next 24-48 hours, I was a total nutcase. I worry about those things too all the time. But in the end, I am soooo happy because I just love our house, it’s worth every moment of worry and every single penny! As the pp’s say, focus on location, especially if you’re nervous about resale value. I honestly think it’s better to buy a house in a decent neighborhood, than to buy a house in an “up-and-coming” neighborhood and hope the area develops more while you’re living there. DH bought a house ~5 years ago, before we met, in a neighborhood his realtor promised him was up-and-coming. When we got married and were ready to buy new house, we had trouble selling his house because that neighborhood STILL isn’t all developed as promised. But the story has a good ending: we were able to find renters, so now we’re actually making a profit off the house as we wait for the area to improve more.

If you guys can, buy a house that you can afford on one salary. That will give you SO Much peace of mind of one of you were to get laid off, want to go back to school, or have a career change – and it could give you the flexibility to be a stay-at-home mom.

Post # 16
4076 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

@amandasouthcarolina:  I love having my own washer and dryer, an attached garage, peace and quiet,  and control of my heating bills. I’m not completely comvinced that buying a home was a good idea. Most days I wish we’d just gone with a nicer apartment. People say you are throwing way money on rent, but when I look at how much we spend on maintenance, upgrades, mortgage interest, taxes, etc I don’t think we will come out ahead.

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