Collectively, my bridesmaids don't seem to care

posted 3 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 3
7630 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: January 2013

@gingerkitten:  I wouldn’t get upset yet. If someone asked me if I was available I’d probably talk to DH and check my schedule before responding. 

Post # 4
918 posts
Busy bee

8 hours?  I can easily be busy enough to go for 8 hours without checking my phone.  If you needed a quick reply, then I really think you should have called them, rather than texting.

I’m not sure when you sent the FB message, but again, not everyone checks their FB messages every day.  Pick up the phone and give them a call.

ETA: I’m sure it’s not that they don’t care, just that they’re busy.  They agreed to be your bridesmaids, so clearly you’re important to them 🙂

Post # 5
8677 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: December 2012

Telephones are pretty much the fastest way to get somebody’s attention.

Post # 6
195 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

Straight up my first thoughts that the group fb message and texts are non urgent and impersonal. I’d personally rather be called.

Post # 7
988 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: March 2012

Your wedding is not until April 2014 so maybe they feel it’s too soon or early to discuss. I was also a bridesmaid and we started discussing and shopping bridesmaids dresses until about  5 to 6 months before wedding.

Post # 8
331 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

Yeah, I think you are being oversensitive.  You are complaining about how quickly they are responding, and yet they have committed themselves to a destination wedding in Italy.  Believe me, they care.  I don’t think you are being fair to your bridesmaids at all.






Post # 9
1178 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

I think you should actually call them. I found tha this worked the best.

Post # 10
4827 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: June 2013 - Upstate NY

People in general just do not respond to “informational” emails. It’s so frustrating. Your BMs probably didn’t read your email and didn’t bother to respond. However I don’t care what anyone says, not responding to any form of communication, even if it’s a text, is rude especially since they agreed to be part of your wedding and they need to make decisions. Sorry, girl, they’re kind of being turds.

Post # 11
502 posts
Busy bee

To use the term ‘finally’ to describe a response in 4 hours, pretty much describes how you’re judging their response times. Be patient! And if you need a faster response, call.

Post # 12
964 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

@SamanthaLovesJames:  Agreed.

They probably *don’t* care. Nor should they. They don’t want to gush about dress choices with you until they actually need to buy them. I go for days without checking my text messages. And if I saw a chipper group message on FB about dresses for a wedding in 2014, I wouldn’t respond crazy fast either.

Post # 13
3355 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

Good grief. Call! 

Post # 14
7206 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

Total overreaction. Some days I dont’t respond to calls or texts for 24 hours or more. Unless its an emergency. Relax. 


Post # 15
1590 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 2014

My service at work is horrible & sometimes I don’t get a text until four hours later. FI doesn’t respond for several hours while he’s working. Relax!

Post # 16
5763 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: October 2014

Wow, a facebook group message? Ummm no thanks. If you actually call, you might get more attention. I think you’re also expecting immediate attention when it’s not really warranted. Relax and pick up the phone. 

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