Post # 1
Two of my friends from college are roommates. I want to invite one, and not the other. I’ve known them both the same amount of time, but don’t want to invite the one because she tends to be a real drama queen.
I’d really like to invite the cool one, but am wondering about how that will go over with the drama queen roommate (who’s already, I’ve been told, pretty mad that I’m not inviting her.)
To put this in perspective, these two girls are from a circle of about a dozen friends. I’m only inviting two of my closest friend from this circle (one of whom is my roomie/BM, and the other is a guy who my fiance and I are both very close to). To include the cool roomate would mean further “alienating” drama queen roommate.
HELP! Should I just invite good roommate and let drama queen roommate deal with it?
Post # 3
You can either ask the roommate you’re inviting to be discreet, don’t invite her, or invite her and not worry about what the other roommate thinks if you’re not friends with her.
You refer to them as roommates, are they your friends?
Post # 4
Are they YOUR roommates? Or simply each others’ roommates?
That’s tough; it’s like the college equivalent of only inviting one half of a couple.
Post # 5
Are you still living with them now? So the drama queen already knows she’s not going to get an invite? If you bothered to invite her now, would that mend what’s happened, or has everything already been ruined?
Have you talked to the roommate you do want to invite? It sounds like you don’t care if you lose her friendship. You might be prepared for the drama queen to unfriend you, but will she be miserable for the roommate she still(?) has to live with, be friends with? I think that’s what you need to figure out.
If you don’t care to lose her friendship, and it isn’t going to be a problem for the good roommate, OK. But if this is going to be messy, I think you need to consider inviting both or none.
Post # 6
- Wedding: October 2010 - The Pearl S. Buck House
I think if you’re only inviting 2/12 from this group of friends, and one is so close she’s a BM, then its no big deal to not invite the other.
Do you keep in touch with the drama queen one? That’s the big question. I’m inviting 1 out of my 6 roommates/suite-mates from college. She’s the only one who wasn’t a huge drama queen and who has made an equal effort to stay in touch despite the fact that she’s the busiest and has kids now. I thought for sure I’d be inviting the other one from senior year… but she has completely lost touch and I’ve lost interest. Life goes on…
Post # 7
Thanks for the thoughts.
Sorry for the grammatical confusion–these aren’t my roommates. They are roommates with each other.
I stay in semi-contact with both of them (facebook, occasional text, etc). I think drama queen has already figured out she’s not invited. I asked some other friends from college, and they’ve all said the same thing–“It’s your wedding, invite the people you want to have there, and don’t invite anyone else.”
I’m going to talk to the one I want to invite and ask her if it would make things too difficult between she and drama queen. If she’s ok with it, though, I’m going to go ahead and invite her.
Post # 8
dont invite anyone you dont WANT to be there! it’s YOUR day!! you dont want unecessary drama at your wedding….ask yourself if you will be talking to this drama queen 5 yrs from now