Post # 1
It seems like the days when brides and grooms automatically combined all their money are over. Nowadays people have more options, but I’m curious if most still combine money.
I know there are articles on here explaining how to go about doing so, but I’m curious how many bees are or have already combined finances with their husbands, and how many are keeping it separate.
Bonus if you explain why you and your husband made the decision you made and/ or how it is working out so far.
Post # 3
We arent married yet but our money is combined. All our bills are shared, so we combined finances mostly for convenience. I was tired of writing 2 checks for the mortgage, electric, etc etc. Its so much easier to use 1 account for all those things.
We originally kept our own personal accounts as well, but even that got to be annoying. Now all our money is combined and for us its just a lot easier.
Post # 4
we have combined 100%. I still get online and pay “my” bills (since I know the passwords) like student loans, car, ect but all money comes out of a account both of our pays get deposited into.
Post # 5
We’ve already partly combined finances and have practiced thinking about them as one pot of money. When we’re officially married, the rest of the finances will be officially combined. We both really like to know exactly what’s going on with the money situation, and it’s so much easier if we can just both access all the accounts. So instead of having 2 savings accounts, 2 checking accounts, and 1 credit card, we’ll have 1 savings, 1 checking, 1 credit. Easier!
Post # 6
We have been together for almost 6 years and our Finances have been together for 5 I would say. We moved in together and do everything together, It would just be silly to have them apart. I honestly think this is a weird topic. In my opinion how do you go out with your bf(of years), FI, or hubby and have to talk about whos going to pay??… or who pays for what bill or grocerys. When you decide you want to really be with someone and get married- dosent that make you “one”. Dont know what everyone elses thinking is here… I dont think we even talked about it, we just did it because it made sence and felt right.
Post # 7
Weve had combined finances since we were just dating. We still have our own separate bank accounts but we hardly ever use them. Our paychecks automatically go into our joint checking account and then from there we talk about our monthly budget and spend the way we want. It has worked well for us!
Post # 8
We combined our finances 100%. We are a team and I didn’t feel comfortable any other way. Right when we got engaged DH decided that he wanted to start his own company. I supported him 100% and took over both the books for the business and assisted him with paying his personal bills. This was our mutual decision that if he wanted to start his own company now was the time to do it. I have a great job and we don’t have children so I was willing to support him while he built his company. In return I plan on being a SAHM so I wanted him to succeed so that someday I can stay at home with out children when they are little. Also because of that I never wanted to have seperate finances because if I am the one home with the kids I never wanted to have to ask for money to take them somewhere or buy them something or even to do food shopping. I pay all of the bills and handle all of the money. It works for us because we both have similiar life goals and want the same things out of life so we agree on the majority of our purchases. We do discuss openly our finances and we both know how much money is in the account at all times that can be used as spending money.
Post # 9
We combined all of ours. We each closed out our individual checking and savings and opened new joint accounts. For things like IRAs and 401ks, we just put each other as beneficiary.
To us, it seemed too complicated to figure out who would pay for what. Because he makes more money, he paid for more, so it always felt a bit odd to me, like he was buying me things. This way, once it is in the accounts it is “ours” and neither of us think about who is paying for what.
The only time it is an issue is at Christmas or for birthdays. We both access our checking account online, so we can see any transactions the other one made. We usually shop in cash for gifts….or shop online at somewhere like Target or Amazon where the other one can’t tell what was bought by the name of the store.
We may in the future each have a separate account for things like that. We’d likely have both names on the account (just in case of emergency) but not peek at the other’s account. It’s kind of a lite version of the three-checkbook system that works for a lot of people. We don’t feel the need to each have an account of our own all the time…but at the holidays and on birthdays, it would help. We are still sorting out how we want to handle that.
Post # 10
We have a joint account for rent, electric, food anything else dealing with home but everything else is seperate. There is two reasons why we are doing this. 1. I am done paying school loans and I am almost done with paying off my car he is not, he pays his school loan and his car off with his money. 2. I never want to be the women who has to give their SO permission to buy something. My parents have combined finances and whenever my Dad wants to buy something like a new pair of jeans he has to ask my Mom if it is ok. My Dad doesn’t like this, and I don’t want to do it to my FI.
ETA- We will not be combining finances 100% after we get married.
Post # 11
@Jenbee: I totally agree with you. Before WB I had no idea that married people didnt combine their finances 100%. However I think a lot of people have different opinions on how a marriage should work, including finances. While it might be right for us, its not necessarily the way for everyone. I cant imagine discussing who is paying for what though!
Post # 12
We combined in December (getting married in July) out of convinence and I’m working as a substitute teacher part time while I finish grad school, so he supports me and the dogs (mostly). In the fall I’m going to have a full time well paying job and he’ll be in school full time. We like being a team a having everything together. When we actually get married, I’m putting him on my credit card and on my large savings account.
Post # 13
We have all of our finances combined. However, we each have our own checking accounts. We have a portion of each of our paychecks put into our own checking accounts so that we have our own spending money. This makes sense for things like gift giving. If I bought it out of our account, he could see this for instance. Plus it allows for him to buy things like DVD’s and PS3 games and I can’t bitch about it.
We decided to combine our finances because DH is notorious for not paying his bills on time even if he has the money. So I handle all of our money and track all of our spending and saving.
Post # 14
We keep separate accounts and separate credit cards. We have a shared account that we use only for the mortgage payments.
I think it’s kind of funny how some of the PP’s expressed not understanding how anyone could possibilty want to keep their money separate. For us, it just made sense. I guess you could say it was the path of least resistance. We started out with separate accounts, it has caused us exactly 0 problems, and to combine accounts now would mean a lot of hassle. When we go out to eat we just try to switch off paying but we don’t keep track or anything. We try to keep things even but because we are married and do consider our money shared overall, it isn’t a big deal either way.
I enjoy having separate accounts because it means that neither of us has to deal with commenting on/giving permission to each other’s purchases, which can add unnecessary stress (at least in our case). We are both very responsible with our money and share a similar outlook on finances. But if I saw everything he was buying I might be inclined micromanage “Did you really need to buy X??” But the truth is, he deserves to be able to buy X just as I deserve to be able to buy a new outfit when I feel like it without his permission.
I think part of why this works for us is may be because our incomes are very similar to begin with, so combining them wouldn’t change how the money is distributed.
Post # 14
We combined 100% and then auto-transfer a monthly “allowance” (hate that word) to our own individual accounts for fun money. Since we’re trying to save a lot right now, the allowance isn’t that big, but it allows us to spend some money without having to tell or ask the other one. Like 95% of our money stays in the joint accounts, though!
Post # 15
We still have all our accounts separated, but I keep a ‘master’ budget sheet that takes both our income and all our spending into account so we know what ‘we’ have. We pay our own credit cards, but don’t really distinguish between whos charging what or whos paying for what bill, mortgage, etc. We happen to divide it up so that I pay the mortgage and he pays everything else, but even though its offically separate, we view it all as ours.