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Hmmm I voted for three topics of controversy in our household, but our tiffs tend to be that FI is not very helpful in wedding planning activities. It's not that he does not care, he just works 80 hours a week (including weekends) and is really not around to help me out. The fights are generally not "you need to help me more" but more "you need to appreciate what I am doing more!" Clearly, the fights are initiated by me : )
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My FI and I have different ideas on how much we want to spend on our wedding. We did sit down and compramise on a budget that we can both work with but he keeps trying to lower the number we agreed upon! I think it comes from him being so thrifty and me being able to walk into a store blind folded and STILL pick out the most expensive item there.....it's something we have to work on!
We haven't had a real fight about the wedding. The closest thing is our ongoing search for an officiant. We are having an interfaith ceremony and his mom is pushing hard for the rabbi of her choice (who may or may not marry us because I want my aunt--a lay minister--involved).
Our meeting with the rabbi did not go well, and I spent a lot of time in tears. I don't think he understands how much it made me feel like an outsider. It's frustrating him, but he thinks I'm a little silly for being so upset.
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Our only major issue was 1-getting rid of the 20+ random pint glasses he has to make room for our nice new glassware and 2-keeping our invites (ie. friends) within our budget. We solved the latter by having just very close friends to the reception and having a big afterparty at a nearby bar for work friends, etc. We ended up compromising on the glasses (chipped ones HAVE to go) but I'm sure it will come up again when we have a whole kitchen to replace!
We really don't fight about any of that stuff. I get more frustrated with him over the stuff he always does, like being late. :-)
We haven't really fought about any of the things on the list in relation to the wedding. We're both really easy going, and what is important to me, he lets me have my way because he doesn't care that much. Me: "i want blush as a color" Him: "sure, i don't care, just make sure the groomsmen don't wear pink" Me: "Ok, what about the flowers?" Him: "ok, just not vests". Pretty basic.
On off topics, we crab a little about our families. Of course. Mine live 5 hours away, and his live 30 minutes away, so we see ALL of his family for EVERY LITTLE SINGLE THING. and it gets on my nerves....i don't want to spend my wonderful 3 day weekend at all of HIS family events. It's overwhelming sometimes, and not always relaxing. He doesn't get why i don't want to be there as much as he does. part of it's jealousy that I don't get to see MY family, but part of it's just the fact that i'm not that close with any of them, and i'd rather spend my time with just me and my FI or my friends rather than his family. They're all nice, but you know how it is. In my mind, I go "why is your family more important than mine?" when reality, it's just feasibility of where everyone is located
Although I do agree with Erindsmar...sometimes it'd be nice if he just said "hey thanks you're doing a great job with the wedding" but boys don't really think that way now, do they? 
We fight about driving. Honestly, we can get a long like peas and carrots but get us in the car together and its inevitable we will argue.
We really haven't had any fights about the wedding, and I consider myself really lucky. We will be discussing it and the conversation might start to get a little heated and he will calm me down and just simply say "This is our wedding, not something to fight about" and it brings me back down to earth ... I say this now and we are 9 months away, I dont know if it will be the same once it starts getting closer. 
The two things I checked were "friends" and "other" ... We typically only argue about two things, which is basically one, we struggle with acting like kids versus acting like grown ups. We go back and forth on where we are in life. We are 25/26 so we are still young and a lot of our friend are still single and going out to bars and getting drunk and doing stupid things ... but then there are a few others that we dont see as often that are more on the same page as us - married or seriously dating - that would be more fun to hang out with ... we just have a hard time finding balance. So that if we go out with the "kids" we sometimes drink too much and get annoying ... or if we go out with the "grownups" one of us can be bored or annoyed. But we really just are trying to find a good place witha good group of friends and I think it's just hard at this time in our lives to find a perfect fit for ourselves. I think it will get better over the next few years! Though we'll probably be the first with a child, so then it will start all over! ha.
My FI is always late, too! He has no sense of time and is frequently forgetful. :(
The only thing we have so far had a tough time seeing the other's point of view on....is religion. We are different religions (but both still Christian) and we are getting married at his parents' church, by his mother who is a minister. So I asked how the ceremony would go. And apparently there are rules, and b/c we are different religions, I don't know these rules. He can't understand why I don't know the rules. I also wanted to know which rules were hard-and-fast rules, and which we could bend/break. Yeah....not a good question. He said that we have to stay by all the rules to keep his mom happy. I was like, since when is your mom one of the ones getting married here?? It's OUR wedding, I think WE should make the rules, not do whatever his mom wants. Yeah. We're still having this conversation.
I voted other- he keeps leaving the door unlocked at our house when he leaves!!!! that is pretty much all we fight about unless i am pms ing, then i want to fight about everything.
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We had disagreements al ot because he thought I was wearing myself too thin and wasn't asking him for help. when i did ask for help it ended up being stuff he wasn't very good at craft wise.
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When we fight, we fight about communication (how he misunderstood me, I misunderstood him) - it's something we always try to work on.
And we fight about the definition of a "clean" house
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Miss Rye Bread, we always fight about communication too! We're so similar in so many ways but when it comes to communicating with each other, we're polar opposites. *sigh* In fact, FI and I are in the middle of a big fight right now -- I believe we've spent about 24 hours giving each other the silent treatment. And mind you, this is the day AFTER we had our premartial counseling class on conflict and communication...we even had a great discussion about it on the way home that night! At this point we're just both being immature about it and we know it, we're just both stubborn and don't want to give in first.
We don't really "fight" but money is our biggest frustration!
My FI drives me crazy because he always brings up the budget and asks me over and over if I'm staying within the budget. I will tell him something will cost X dollars and he'll say "are you sure??" I tell him YES!! He always thinks there is some sort of scam we can fall into, which is true, and I know he is being precautious, but is so annoying! And it has lead to a few budget arguments about the wedding ;)
We don't really argue very much but when we do it's usually about money/his job or lack thereof and on one occasion, religion.
Gabgal- Me and my FI are the same way! Put us in the house, at the store, shopping, eating, around the parents...we are so happy and peaceful, but put us in the car...well, really me in the car haha...and it's go time. I get really stressed when we drive to new places because we both have AWFUL senses of direction and get lost approximately 87% of the time we're in the car, and I despise feeling lost. So it's the same thing over and over. He tells me if we ever win the lottery that we're hiring a driver.
Otherwise, we have little tiffs about him not taking the wedding planning seriously and realizing that this is something I've drempt about since I could dress Barbie in a white dress and make Ken kiss the bride...i.e. him wanting carnival games at the wedding and serving funnel cakes for dessert (no offense and more power to those of you having that kind of whimsy at your wedding- it's just not my style!)
We don't really fight....we in general agree that we come from very different families with very different values and this makes for....."interesting" conversations from time to time. For the most part, we are happy if the other's happy kinda thing.
Words of appreciation. I feel like with juggling wedding planning, graduate school and work, I could appreciate some acts of kindness and words of appreciation from him. He says he doesn't feel like he should say 'thank you for cleaning up the dishes...' or 'thank you for doing the laundry'. But it would mean a lot if he recognized the little things. Because that is what life is made of.
I am fine with the level of involvement he provides to the wedding planning. we made the decisions about the who should be the caterer, the wedding coordinator, the musicians for the ceremony together. I feel as though there is equal involvement- but I understand if he isn't into the finer details of the wedding planning; who should get what gifts, what the bridesmaid should wear etc.
I still love my man! I am sick with the flu, and decided to sleep on the couch so as to let him get a full nights rest. and he said "I couldn't fall asleep last night for the first two hours because you weren't with me". :o)
My FI and I the other day had an little 'discussion' the other day about his involvement in the wedding. I am doing so much for the wedding, and two things he needed to do 1. Call the band and 2. He needed to call our church wedding coordinator to answer some questions. Both still sit undone. He got mad at me for reminding him because he said "he'll get there". Well, 2 weeks later, still not done, so I ended up getting really mad and more so upset and offended because he was just blowing off the stuff he needed to do.
Does anyone have good suggestions on how to get your FI excited about planning wedding stuff?
Amen Sparkles! That is our routine little argument. We don't have many blow up fights but it is more me informing him about how appreciative he should be : )
Thought the past few weeks he has been saying thank you about everything, so I think he finally gets it (after almost 8 years!!) :
For some reason, Mr. Pavillionette and I do not fight over the normal hot topics. I think we've had the most fights over linguistics, of all things, including one time I stormed out of his apartment over a disagreement about child language acquisition. (No, we're not linguists--just crazy!)
MONEY!!! Buying a house, his job (company not doing well, I want him to look around, he hates change)
We rarely fight about wedding stuff, mostly I get frustrated cause his family makes me insane with their lack of emotion about EVERYTHING.
my FI and i never faught until we got engaged and then the stress of planning a wedding had us snaping at eachother (well ok, i was snapping at him) very soon after the ring was on. once we decided to elope everything has gone back to its peaceful normal self
hes the ideas man and im the planner. so when he says lets go Uepi (the Solomons) to get married, its my job to organize it. i found during the early engagement stage that i was trying to consult him and thats what caused the frustration - i should know by now just to take control, book and plan and just tell him when the limo is picking us up to take us to the airport
when im particulary moody or disagreeable (usually after i see or speak to my mother) tells me to go have a nap :)
Sometimes when one or the other of us is stressed we'll fight about things that are just little frustrations or annoyances ... our fight about the color of the groomsmen's ties comes to mind ...
He does like to gripe about how much time I spend blogging. I have a terrible habit of being glued to my laptop instead of paying attention to him. 
We don't fight about stuff. We're lucky in that we agree about money, religion and the big stuff... but we do squabble about really stupid stuff. The other day we fought because his ATM card wouldn't work at the gas station and he didn't bother to go ask the attendant whether the card reader was broken. I thought it would be important to know whether it was his card or the gas station that caused the problem. He didn't.
See, our squabbles are *really* mundane and dare I say, stupid ;)
We fight about his family. He gets very defensive whenever I say or ask anything about his family. For example on Friday I asked, "what does your mom like to eat for breakfast?" Apparently it was a nasty question and he made me feel like a complete jerk. Mind you, I was at the counter making a grocery list so I could feed his parents who came to our house for the three day weekend. Needless to say, my three day weekend sucked and I am anxiously awaiting Tuesday morning.
I didn't vote for any - we don't really fight at all! I get annoyed way too often, but it pretty much always stays at that level - thank goodness! ;)
We have been fighting about how much to spend on the wedding. He wants to spend less, but I want to spend more knowing it's only one day in my life.
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he says I talk too much about the money and the wedding
it's my greatest stresor since I'm paying for it, he's paying for the English bash, I'm the stateside. so I get very stressed, I never wanted to spned 20,000 and here I am at 22,000 including honeymoon, my original budget was 15,000...
aw well, now I focus on the good things, we're coming together, all our immediate family will be with us, it's a beautiful day in our life
I wouldn't say we all out fought about money, but there were tears shed. I think that was our major issue during our engagement (finances surrounding the wedding).
We've been fighting about his family lately. We're over 200km away from eachother right now and I'm 400km away from our hometown, but I end up having to drive the 400km each way almost every other weekend so I can attend family stuff. I feel like I don't have a real life anymore because I'm either working or driving for yet another family event (and I don't mean my family). Since we are long distance, if I were to skip a family weekend, I'd skip seeing him, too.
In my family, once we all started going off to university, birthdays and other small events fell by the wayside. We call each other to say happy birthday, but don't throw birthday parties that the whole family must attend. In his family, though, we have to go home for everything -his mom's birthday, his dad's birthday, his brothers' birthdays, family barbecues, etc. Not that birthdays aren't important but I don't think it's realistic to expect us to go home for them all - if we went home for every immediate family member's birthday on my side AND his side, we'd be going home once a month without factoring in the inevitable holidays, baby showers, bridal showers, etc.
We fight because for him it's normal, but for me, it's excessive, and I worry that it's never going to change. I love his family but I want to live my own life, too.
Thanks for the vent :)
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I came across this list of common fights among engaged couples, so I thought I would make it a poll (you can vote for more than one)!