Post # 1
I talk to most of my bridesmaids regularly. Not necessarily about wedding or bridesmaid stuff, just everyday conversations, I mean after all they were my friends before they ever agreed to be bridesmaids. I’ve done two newsletters so far (before people jump on me), they are very basic info/pictures. Since everyone lives different places I though that another communication avenue might be helpful. Everyone doesn’t have facebook and I wanted to keep the email chains to an absolute minimum. I try to avoid long email chains of back and forth because they can get too long and confusing. This is especully true when you have a couple long chains. An unorganized or even just a busy person can get discombobulated with that. Skype, group texts and of course mutiple 3-way calls were an option, but being the organized/streamlined person that I am I wanted something that was all-inclusive.
I had used this group/club/sorority/non-profit site before and thought that with all the extras like video chat, conference calls, chatroom, calendar, poll/to do lists, and file/picture upload capabilities it would be a good fit. Everyone has signed in so far. Problem is we don’t use it. They had a skype meeting on their own terms about bridal shower plans. Everyone didnt have skype, they couldn’t figure out how to do group call…(lets just say it wasn’t a mess, but it wasn’t smooth sailing either). We are starting to do dress stuff and it seems to me that they have some questions so I wanted to do a video chat (using the group site). The site sent an email asking for when they are available. (We have different time zones to consider). But no one has answered back yet.
Now I had thought about getting rid of the site since we hadn’t been using it, but I thought this was a good time to familarize themselves with it so then they would be more likely to use it when they do stuff without me. I am not soooo stuck on using this site that I’ll refuse to use anything else. If I see that they are just about refusing (by ignoring) the use of the site…i’ll say “F” it and go on with the email chains and skype and whatever else they feel “comfortable” using. But to me using all those different avenues can be messy, why not have everything in one place?
Just FYI: I am not mad at my girls or want to force the issue, but I do find it slightly annoying when you try to make things easier on people and they rather do it the hard way.
How did you communicate and what were the pros and cons?
Post # 2
Ah too bad not everyone has facebook. i’ve always used facebook group message for any communication with my own bridesmaids, or other bridal parties i was MOH in. It always worked out well. could send pics, follow the messages easily, without blowing up peoples phones like group text does.
I personally dont see anything wrong with email chains. if you send something important- individually text your girls to let them know theres something new going on. should be able to help people keep up w whats going on.
Post # 3
MrsHistory-Bee: I only had two bridesmaids. Text messages were easiest for us. And Facebook but since not everyone in your situation has it, that’s not an option. Adding in websites and emails and Skype just seems too complicated, everyone checks their phone regularly so it was the best option for us and worked out fabulously.
Post # 4
I think good old fashioned email and call/text is still the best option. I don’t want to have to log in, create accounts, set up my web cam, arrange a video chat, etc just to talk about whether we like Dusty Pink or Light Blush for a dress option.
Don’t overcomplicate it and just stick to more familiar avenues of communication for people.
Post # 5
Email, BBM Group (can be download on any OS phone now) and I also use my wedding app –> appy couple
Post # 6
I don’t understand why you think email is confusing or hard to use.
Post # 7
MrsHistory-Bee: Honestly, your BMs don’t care about this as much as you do. To them, your wedding is half a year away, and they are excited but not really thinking about it. It seems world away to them and they probably have no idea half how long your to do list is and why you want to do anything early. (This is actually my experience with my bridesmaids. I felt like all my hollywood dreams of doing wedding things with my BMs were shattered lol). They probably just feel like they don’t really have anything to talk about together, or not much, and that’s that. It sucks. I wish my ladies were more interested. Now they are getting interested because we are 3 weeks away! But don’t expect them to obsess over this the way you will (and besides, should anyone be more excited about your wedding then than you and FI?)
I ended up just talking with each of them the way I normally do to sort things out. Facebook, calls, texts. It ended up being the easiest. Just recently though two of them started talking about shoes on our facebook group, so it’s nice for them to have the option to chat, even if they don’t end up using it!
Post # 8
ren89: I thought about group texts, but one of my girls I know for sure is likely to drop in and out of conversation. I know this becasue this is how we mostly communicate anyway. Now if the group text just involves a yes or no, of course her answering when she has time isn’t an issue…..but conversation wise (like what I am trying to do in a few weeks) it can be a problem. Not to mention everyone doesn’t have the cellphone capabilities for regular group messages or for outside group text services, ex. groupme. It isn’t a huge bridal party or anything but its more than two people with varying issues.
Post # 9
i had 3 BMs and my brother. my brother just needed to show up to the wedding.
i talked/talk to my girls regularly anyway. but wedding related stuff, i sent our an email.
everything went smoothly and i had no issues.
Post # 10
junkbee: Oh I don’t think it is confusing or hard under normal circumstances. But lets say for example I am trying to explain what I need them to do about bridesmaid dresses, that conversation would be best had over the phone or video chat, i.e. skype rather than back and forth via email.
I have used email in group instances before and because people check email when they want and some people have different email servers. Some opinions went unnoticed by others because in that particular email chain they read the initial message and maybe not the followup person A sent but read the one that person B sent. You see what I mean? I’ve had negative experiences dealing with group email chains is all.
Post # 11
Maybe my bridal party plans and situation was just over simplified but we didn’t do anything Special to communicate. I texted/call/saw all 6 individually and asked about a date to try on dresses. Also mentioned in person/text when I was doing invites and favors a week for anyone wanted to help (100% optional). I sent one email to list out hair appointment times and told them to come to my parents house after hair. I did an evite for the rehearsal dinner. That was it.
My MOH emailed out the bachelorette party plan and asked for an RSVP. (She set all plans first.). Now for hers I started a Facebook event since it is a weekend trip that requires coordinating, but you mentioned that’s not an option.
It seemed easy, but I get that your situation might be more complicated with more out of town or more girls.
Post # 12
nawella: I kind of felt like that a few months ago about “excitement” levels and not really understanding how much I had to do so far out. Matter of fact my moh would say “Aww I can’t wait till you really start planning.” Lol, I would just laugh it off and think…”if only you knew.”
But now I don’t really feel that way anymore. Their interest level is pretty good I think for wher I am in relation to my wedding date. I know they kind of had some questions after my last newsletter, which is why I thought it would be a good time to have a group Q and A kind of. Like I said if they want to use Skype instead of the site I have set up…that’s cool but I would have rathered all avenues of (wedding) communication go through one medium.
Post # 13
This all seems crazy complicated. How much do you have to talk about on a regular basis with them? The last time I was a bridesmaid was before smart phones and somehow we all managed to be in the right place wearing the right clothes.
Post # 14
I agree with PP….holy crap, does all this seem complicated. Maybe my wedding plans are way more simple, or my BMs are psychic. I made a Facebook group so pictures could be posted, but otherwise I call them or text them. I have one girl who isn’t great at getting back to me right away but if it’s something important I just pick up the phone.
I think if one of my friends sent me newsletters about her wedding I would probably ask her if she’s been consuming a wee bit too much wine whilst wedding planning, and why the hell she wasn’t sharing the wine.
However, since the Skype video chat isn’t working well, I do totally understand using a different video site. Google mail has a nice video chat function (free) that works well. Not sure if it does group chat though.
Post # 15
Call/text/a lot of e-mails (we’re all in different states). It’s worked for the most part and we hashed out the dresses, hairm, makeup and when they need to be where at what time pretty quickly.