- 4 years ago
- Wedding: September 2014
I’m just curious if anyone at your company holds the title of “Most Likely To Send Out Mass Emails That Don’t Need To Be Mass Emails.”
At our company, the job function of one particular position here seems to solely be that of sending out weekly, company-wide emails; typically, the lecturing variety. Based on her title, I do not believe this is part of her job description.
There have been quite a few I save in a folder. Some recent notable mentions:
The Lunch Thief
Like many large buildings, we seem to have a bit of a problem with a lunch thief. As irritating as it must be to have your Ensure or Hot Pocket stolen by this culprit, it’s just kind of become common knowlege not to put anything in the fridge. Lately, however, the Lunch Thief must be living large, as he has been the subject of what feels like *daily* emails.
Memorable Quote: “Today, someone had their deviled eggs stolen. If this continues, we will put locks on the fridge/put up cameras/ban eating all together.”
Periodically, our company will cater in lunch. Always, there will be at least 4 emails sent out in the days/day leading up to it instructing everyone on the proper way to walk down the stairs, approach the caterer, and take your plate. The system is always unneccesarily complicated, usually involving conflicting instructions and/or use of smoke signals.
Memorable Quote: “This is not acceptable: complaining to the caterers about not having cheese.”
This was apparently so serious that it required the entire building cc’d, flagged as “HIGH IMPORTANCE.”
Memorable Quote: “The candy at my desk is for a little snack. It is NOT for you to take back to your desk with you or eat at home. Due to this, I am removing the candy bowl.”
Does anyone else have a Mass-Emailer on their hands?