(Closed) COMPLICATED parent/ceremony situation , please help me figure something out?

posted 5 years ago in Ceremony
Post # 3
Member
772 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

@Leemarie:  Yes you’re idea is perfect.  Do it.  Good for you for taking the high road and avoiding drama.  Now, to FURTHER avoid drama, don’t share your final decision with anyone else… not your grandma, your aunt, etc.  Just plan on doing it.  If someone makes a stink about it at or after the wedding, don’t engage.  Good luck!

Post # 4
Member
3773 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: December 1999

I think your idea sounds good, your FMIL will have a moment with the two of that she deserves and you will avoid any extra drama with your mom.

Post # 6
Member
2401 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

Your idea is perfect. Keep it as such, even if she doesn’t necessarily deserve it. 

Also, if you need any support dealing with a parent’s mental health (including hospitilization and perm. memory loss), please feel free to PM me. I’m there with you and dealing with a very similar situation. 

Post # 7
Member
1868 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: March 2014

Sounds like a great idea to me! 

Post # 10
Member
81 posts
Worker bee

@Leemarie:  You could also have your fiance walk his mother in.  There’s no complimentary role for your mom in that sense.

Post # 11
Member
3697 posts
Sugar bee

Your idea about the roses is perfectly gracious in every way. One of the definitions of “grace” is love that is freely given in spite of being undeserved. Sounds exactly like your gesture of giving your mom the rose – and it’s a beautiful touch to include in your wedding. You might even give one to Grandma, too – spread a little extra grace around!

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