Post # 1
Future Sister-In-Law got engaged about 2 weeks prior to Fiance and I. Fiance, Future Sister-In-Law, and I all live in the DC area but most of FI’s family lives in the NY area. As Fiance and I begin to discuss venues and dates I have grown worried that FIs family will have to come to 2 Out of Town weddings in a short period of time and would have to make a choice as to which wedding to attend.
I don’t know how to address this or even if I should. Any advice from the bees? I don’t want to ruffle any feathers but I think it’s a legitimate concern. We are trying for an early Spring 2012 wedding and I don’t want to come off like I am dictating to his sister when she should have her wedding. At the same time, I don’t want to put our guests in the position to have to choose. And if they do indeed choose I’m sure either her or Fiance feelings will be hurt.
Post # 3
Why don’t you find out when she’s planning to have her wedding? Go out to dinner all four of you, find out what their wedding plans are and then you can organize something that works for everyone.
You’re right that you can’t tell your Future Sister-In-Law when to have her wedding, if she chooses to have it in early spring as well you’ll just have to live with it. You get one wedding day and if you both have your hearts set on say April 2012 neither of you can make the other one change but you’ll have to try and work together.
Post # 4
I think Unsuspecting Bride said it perfectly.
You don’t know yet when they are thinking? I think it’s normal to have that conversation as two engaged couples. My friend and I both wanted March 2012. I know the whole “you only get one day” thing, but we ended up talking about it and Fiance and I decided we would move ours up to Feb. It just wasn’t that big of a deal. We didn’t want any issues. (This is a good friend; I.E. her parents will be invited, we’ll be bridesmaids for eachother, etc.) And I don’t care WHAT day it is when I get married to my Fiance, I just want it to be sooner rather than later. :p
Post # 5
Thanks, bees. If their family were local it would be a non-issue but since the family is traveling for both (presumably) it raised some concerns for their travel expenses not anything else. If everyone were local I wouldn’t care if the weddings were back to back. LOL I have no idea when she is considering. We’re not really that close, she quickly mentioned to Fiance early next year but as far as I know no dates have been set.
I do like the idea of maybe grabbing a bite to talk it over.